The Pact Of The Real Pack
by twilight-moon09
Summary: It takes a real man to protect a life. It takes real women to be the Great Protectors and protect the tribe of the La Push Reservation. The Pact of the Pack is strong, and none of us will break it. The wolves of La Push as women.
1. Epilogue

**THE PACT **

**OF**

**THE PACK**

**Epilogue**

It's been said that growing up is one of the hardest parts in life. Especially for girls, everything happens so much faster for us than boys. Emotions are stronger, tempers are shorter, words are harsher, and life is more brutal. They say it's not that hard if you have really good friends to keep you sane, and I definitely have that. The bonds are indestructible, and there are no secrets in The Pack. But we'll get to that later.

The truth of the matter is, no matter how great a circle a friends you may have, nothing can fill the space where your mother is supposed to be.

My mother passed away when I was 11, and ever since then it's been me, my sister, and my dad Billy.

When she passed, my aunt Emily kind of stepped in and was there for us. If she hadn't, who knows how we would've turned out. She held us when we cried, when we had questions, when we had problems, gave us advice, took us shopping, all the things a mom would do. All the things my dad couldn't do. Not just because he's a guy, but…just because.


	2. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1 : Losing Your Hear****t**

On February 20, a drunk driver driving on the wrong side of the road at 70 miles per hour collided head on with a cherry red Jeep Cherokee on the winding road into the La Push Reservation at 12:43 am. The crash took the life of the driver in the jeep Cherokee, a 34 year old female on her way home from work at the hospital. Her name was Rachel Black, and she was my mother.

She had the warmest face, deep dimples and high cheek bones. And the most lovely, chocolaty brown eyes, her hair was like a brownish-black sea flowing down her back. Her skin was a russet brown and exceptionally beautiful, only matching her bright and youthfully heartwarming personality. And the night she left this earth, she took a piece of my heart with her.

I was so young when she was taken from us, and my big sister was 14 and just starting high school. When she passed, everybody took it hard…friends, family. The entire reservation. But Angel took it the roughest. My mother's greatest pride and joy, next to her family, was her home. And she devoted much effort into making it into a place of comfort and love. This was something that engulfed you when you first walked through the door. Her presence was still here, still vibrant as ever. It was what she and Angel connected on, Angel helped my mother decorate it. It was the place where her fondest memories of my mother lived. So it wasn't hard to imagine how this safe haven for her soon became a torture chamber. Painful memories, horrible reminders that dumped her back into this inescapable reality. So her solution to dealing with this was escaping it. Angel did exceptionally well in school, graduating early at the top of her class with a 4.0 grade point average and enough scholarship money to go anywhere she wanted. Anywhere but home.

Anywhere but La Push.

She ran as soon as she got the chance.

But just because Angel found a way to escape reality, doesn't mean the rest of us did. We did not find or take such an easy way out. Throughout her four years of high school, she was almost always at the library studying. Never at home. So in a way, for me and my dad, it was like she was already gone. I used to resent her for her distancing herself from us like this, for leaving me the way she did. She never really was like a big sister to me, anytime I needed advice or a shoulder to cry on, she was never around. It took my aunt Emily to explain to me how people different people deal with death in their own way, and this was hers. I'd hated her for how selfish she was being, but it wasn't really her fault. Angel wasn't as strong as the rest of us, and really didn't handle this in a way we see as proper. She hadn't it the best way she could, only doing what she deemed was best for herself. It helped me to understand her better.

Aunt Emily.

One of the kindest, most sweetest, most softest souls I'd ever known apart from my mother. She was her sister and they were only a few subtle differences between them. Even their laugh was the same. Her hair had more of a red element to it, but it was just as long as my moms. And her daughter looked and acted just like her. As I acted like my mother. Kim was a tad shorter than me I was. My birthday was six months before hers, making me older. Her personality was a lot softer than my own, my temper got the best of me sometimes. Other than that, we were a lot alike. She was my best friend and my sister. More of a sister than Angel could ever be to me. We even looked like sisters, apart from the hair and the eye color. Hers were green, like Aunt Emily. We looked like our moms at our age, according to her. And just as close as they were, too.

So for us, the word "cousins" didn't quite describe what we were to each other. It didn't sum up our relationship, our friendship. It didn't even come close. Kim was my sister, and she's been there for me through everything. There was nothing closer than that. At least, back then.

We went through everything together.

School in La Push, which was a lot more scandalous than people would imagine it to be. It was just us, and Claire. My other best friend, and other sister. We were a trio. Claire stayed three houses down from my own, and she was always here. She was one of us, and no one saw her as any different. She was part of the family.

School at La Push Middle was a lot more scandalous than people would imagine it to be. It was just the three of us against the world. Claire was the most imaginative, scheming, and crafty individuals I'd ever met. Most of our pranks and plans we'd committed, Claire was the mastermind behind the operation. She was clearly the thinker of the group, though most times she wasn't the rational one. She was very intelligent for her to be how old she was, but she let her temper get the best of her thinking sometimes. But we went through everything together growing up, at the same time. Especially the most important thing to ever happen to us, the thing that changed all of our lives forever.


	3. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2 : Oh My God, This Isn't Happening**

"I just don't think he's as bad as you make him out to be. He seems really nice."

Kim was trying to convince Claire that maybe Tony Atchos wasn't completely horribly disgusting. Like always, Claire wasn't for it.

We were walking home for school, another rough day in the eighth grade for La Push Middle. It was the second week in November, and it was a pretty warm day for it to be so late into fall. We were thankful for that. At that point in time, we really didn't have a care in the world except from the normal teenage girl stuff. To put it plainly, boys. But little did we know, our calm little world was soon to come crashing down on us from all directions. Good thing we all stuck through it together.

"Come on Claire, he's not that bad. A little kiss on the cheek couldn't hurt." I chimed in, and Claire leered at me in return.

"If he's such a hot ticket, why don't one of you kiss him? Don't act like I'm overreacting, you both know what's wrong with him. It's like he doesn't even know chap-stick exists. He'd probably cut my lips up with his chainsaws."

We all laughed, knowing she was telling every bit of the truth. Tony Atchos was a 4'7, chubby, acne ridden pubescent boy with dry lips and a greasy, slick black haircut. Claire knew we had been teasing her. But it all came to an end once we reached my house.

I stared at it confused. "Hey Kim, isn't that your mom's car?" She just looked at me like I had a helmet on and was drooling uncontrollably.

"No crap, Jordan." Then she focused on the situation at hand, looking as confused as I was. "She's home early…."

Her thoughts trailed off absentmindedly. We slowly approached the house and we could hear them arguing from outside.

"You've got to be kidding me. It's not time yet. She's just 13. All of them are."

My father's voice rang clear as a bell as I picked up the anger and frustration in his voice, something was going on. I could feel it. He almost never argued with Aunt Emily, and even if they did it was over us.

"Billy, have you seen them? Have you seen her? It's time."

By now we all walked in the door looking lost and they both stared at us. My dad's mouth made a tight straight line with his eyes narrowed, a look he always made when he disapproved or had no control over something. Aunt Emily's face was thoughtful. She smiled at us.

"Hi girls. How was school?" She walked to give us hugs. "We're fine. Mom what's going on?" Kim was the one who spoke first. I was glad, because Claire and I were too speechless.

She threw one final look at Billy then smiled at us. "We're gonna go shopping."

Shopping? What was the big deal about that?

"She's too young. It's not time." Billy stated, I looked at him. There was something I was missing. She rolled her eyes and ignored him.

"Shopping for what?" I blurted, I couldn't take it any longer.

"Your first bras." Aunt Emily was excited for some strange, unexplainable reason.

Our faces fell to ones of pure petrifaction, our expressions were pale and ghostly. "Oh my god, this isn't happening." I whispered.

"How embarrassing." Kim whispered to me.

Claire's voice jumped a few octaves, indicating she was nervous and completely uncomfortable. "Uhh….yeah mom? - (she pretended to hear her mother calling) - Come home? On my way!" She darted for the door but Aunt Emily snatched her.

"Not so fast, I talked to your mother and she's fine with this and agreed it was time. I thought you'd want to do this with your sisters."

"Oh my god, this can't be happening." The words slid breathlessly from my mouth again, my mind was a foggy embarrassing mess.

* * *

Aunt Emily ushered us out the house to her car, and drove us to the nearest mall. All the while attempting to console us on the fact that this was nothing to be embarrassed or ashamed of, and that we should be proud. It's a part of growing up. Still, her words only made us want to tuck and roll out the car even more. All three of us felt like dying. But nothing could compare to the anxiety once we got to the store.

It felt like all piercing eyes were on us, and people knew EXACTLY what we were here for. They waited anticipating our moves as we took each forced step towards that dreaded section of the store. We were pale white, and stiff as a corpse.

"This can't be happening," I kept thinking to myself.

All I kept thinking to myself along with that thought, and I'm pretty sure they were thinking it too, was I hope that no one recognizes us.

How embarrassing. I mean, jeez, telling Billy about this? How much more embarrassing could you get? And he got so upset. Actually, lately he's been getting more upset at the little things I do and Aunt Emily has been talking to him a lot more. I'm glad I have her to take up for me, and explain the situations to him from my point of view. I mean, I know it's hard to accept when your little girl grows up, especially since Angel left and he feels like I'm all he's got, but Billy has been taking to an extreme. Yesterday I told him my jeans weren't fitting anymore, and he blew a gasket. He threw a complete fit. All because I got taller. And oh, don't even let me tell you about last month when I needed a new pair of shoes. He almost had a heart attack. The month is now fervently referred to as "Black October." It's just like, he really doesn't want me grow up. Any of us.

Sometimes I would catch him just staring at me with this look, like he was sorry or something. Like it was something he wished he could do, but couldn't. He didn't want to let me go.


	4. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3 : Legends By The Fire**

"I can't believe it. We're starting high school next year!" Claire was painting her toes. We were getting ready.

"I know, but being 14 doesn't feel any different." I was at my dresser picking out the perfect pair of earrings to wear. The seashells, or the wooden ones?

"Tonight will be so much fun. I just hope it's not too hot." Kim was sitting at the computer looking at cars. For her to be so soft spoken and girly, she loved getting her hands dirty and working on cars. Automotives fascinated her. Aunt Emily hated when she came home all dirty from working on her engine, she now calls her grease monkey. Kim was currently putting together an engine for an old rabbit she'd begged for. As long as she could put it together and make it run.

"Well it's already hot." It was my birthday, July 7, and tonight we would have a bonfire down on first beach. Everybody was invited. And it was a night I would never forget.

After a few hours of laughter when the sun finally went down, we all sat around the fire roasting marshmallows and hot dogs. Everyone was there. Aunt Emily invited a few of her coworkers and some cousins, Samantha Uley and her mother were there, the elders and the council of the tribe, and Harry Clearwater and his family. His wife Sue made everyone desserts, she was really nice. And their son and daughter came, too. Jacob was older than Sarah, but they looked just alike. Claire's ancient, white-haired grandfather, Henry Call, sat beside my Billy around the fire. The entire council was here.

When it was completely nightfall and the moon was glowing, we all gathered closer to hear Billy tell us the stories of the Quileute Legends. The fire suddenly rose so high, I thought the sparks could reach the sky and burn each of the little sprinkled stars making them burn brighter. The moon shined full and beautifully. It was breathtaking. Like magic.

Everyone quieted as my dad cleared his throat then began. The words poured out with precision, as if he knew them by heart, but also with feeling and a subtle rhythm. Like poetry performed by it's author. I'd never seen this side of him. I was astonished.

**"The Quileutes have been a small people from the beginning, and we are a small people still. But we have never disappeared. This is because there has always been magic in our blood. It wasn't always the magic of shape-shifting - that came later. First, we were the spirit warriors."**

Never had I recognized the ring of majesty that was in my father's voice, though I realized now that this authority had always been there.

**"In the beginning, the tribe settled in this harbor and became skilled ship builders and fishermen. But the tribe was small, and the harbor was rich in fish. There were others who coveted our land, and we were too small to hold it. A larger tribe moved against us, and we took to our ships to escape them. **

**Kaheleha was not the first spirit warrior, but we do not remember the stories that came before his. We do not remember who wa the first to discover this power, or how it had been used before this crisis. Keheleha was the first great Spirit Chief in our history. In this emergency, Kaheleha used the magic to defend our land. **

**He and all his warriors left the ship - not their bodies, but their spirits. Their women watched over the bodies and the waves, and the men took their spirits back to our harbor. They could not physically touch the enemy tribe, but they had other ways. The stories tell us that they could blow fierce winds into their enemy's camps; they could make a great screaming in the wind that terrified their foes. The stories also tell us that the animals could see the spirit warriors and understand them; the animals would do their bidding.**

**Kaheleha took his spirit army and wreaked havoc on the intruders. This invading tribe had packs of big, thick-furred dogs that they used to pull their sleds in the frozen north. The spirit warriors turned the dogs against their masters and then brought a mighty infestation of bats up from the cliff caverns. They used the screaming wind to aid the dogs in confusing the men. The dogs and bats won. The survivors scattered, calling our harbor a cursed place. The dogs ran wild when the spirit warriors released them. The Quileutes returned to their bodies their wives, victorious.**

**The other nearby tribes, the Hohs and the Makahs, made treaties with the Quileutes. They wanted nothing to do with our magic. We lived in peace with them. When an enemy came against us, the spirit warriors would drive them off.**

**Generations passed. Then came the last great Spirit Chief, Taha Aki. He was known for his wisdom, and for being a man of peace. The people lived will and content in his care. But there was one man, Utlapa, who was not content.**

**Utlapa was one of Chief Taha Aki's strongest spirit warriors - a powerful man, but a grasping man, too. He thought the people should use their magic to expand their lands, to enslave the Hohs and the Makahs and build an empire. Now, when the warriors were their spirit selves, they knew each other's thoughts. Taha Aki saw what Utlapa dreamed, and was angry with Utlapa. Utlapa was commanded to leave the people, and never use his spirit self again. Utlapa was a strong man, but the chief's warriors outnumbered him. He had no choice but to leave. The furious outcast hid in the forest nearby, waiting for a chance to get revenge against the chief.**

**Even in times of peace, the Spirit Chief was vigilant in protecting his people. Often, he would go to a sacred, secret place in the mountains. He would leave his body behind and sweep down through the forests and along the coast, making sure no threat approached.**

**One day, when Taha Aki left to perform this duty, Utlapa followed. At first, Utlapa simply planned to kill the chief, but this plan had it's drawbacks. Surely the spirit warriors would seek to destroy him, and they could follow faster than he could escape. As he hid in the rocks and watched the chief prepare to leave his body, another plan occurred to him.**

**Taka Aki knew it the instant that Utlapa had joined him in the spirit world, and he also knew Utlapa's murderous plan. He raced back to his secret place, but even the winds weren't fast enough to save him. When he returned, his body was already gone. Utlapa's body lay abandoned, but Utlapa had not left Taha Aki with an escape - he had cut his own body's throat with Taha Aki's hands.**

**Taha Aki followed his body down the mountain. He screamed at Utlapa, but Utlapa ignored him as if he were mere wind.**

**Taha Aki watched with despair as Utlapa took his place as chief of the Quileutes. For a few weeks, Utlapa did nothing but make sure that everyone believed he was Taha Aki. Then the changes began - Utlapa's first edict was to forbid any warrior to enter the spirit world. He claimed that he'd had a vision of danger, but really he was afraid. He knew that Taha Aki would be waiting for the chance to tell his story. Utlapa was also afraid to enter the spirit world himself, knowing Taha Aki would quickly claim his body. So his dreams of conquest with a spirit warrior army were impossible, and he sought to content himself with ruling over the tribe. He became a burden - seeking privileges that Taha Aki had never requested, refusing to work alongside his warriors, taking a young second wife and then a third, though Taha Aki's wife lived on - something unheard of in the tribe. Aki watched in helpless fury.**

**Eventually, Taha Aki tried to kill his own body to save the tribe from Utlapa's excesses. He brought a fierce wolf down from the mountains, but Utlapa hid behind his warriors. When the wolf killed a young man who was protecting the false chief, Taha Aki felt horrible grief. He ordered the wolf away.**

**All the stories tell us that it was no easy thing to be a spirit warrior. It was more frightening than exhilarating to be freed from one's body. This is why they only used their magic in times of need. The chief's solitary journeys was disorienting, uncomfortable, horrifying. Taha Aki had been away from his body for so long at this point that he was in agony. He felt he was doomed - never to cross over to the final and where his ancestors waited, stuck in this torturous nothingness forever.**

**The great wolf followed Taha Aki's spirit as he twisted and writhed in agony through the woods. The wolf was very large for its kind, and beautiful. Taha Aki was suddenly jealous of the dumb animal. At least it had a body. At least it had a life. Even life as an animal would be better than this horrible empty consciousness. **

**And then Taha Aki had the idea that changed us all. He asked the great wolf to make room for him, to share. The wolf complied. Taha Aki entered the wolf's body with relief and gratitude. It was not his human body, but it was better than the void of the spirit world. **

**As one, the man and the wolf returned to the village on the harbor. The people ran in fear, shouting for the warriors to come. The warriors ran to meet the wolf with their spears. Utlapa, of course, stayed safely hidden.**

**Taha Aki did not attack his warriors. He retreated slowly from them, speaking with his eyes and trying to yelp the songs of his people. The warriors began to realize that the wolf was no ordinary animal, that there was a spirit influencing it. One older warrior, a man named Yut, decided to disobey the false chief's order and try to communicate with the wolf.**

**As soon as Yut crossed to the spirit world, Taha Aki left the wolf - the animal waited tamely for his return - to speak to him. Yut gathered the truth in an instant, and welcomed his true chief home.**

**At this time, Utlapa came to see if the wolf had been defeated. When he saw Yut lying lifeless on the ground, surrounded by protective warriors, he realized what was happening. He drew his knife and raced forward to kill Yut before he could return to his body.**

**"Traitor!" he screamed, and the warriors did not know what to do. The chief had forbidden spirit journeys, and it was the chief's decision how to punish those who disobeyed.**

**Yut jumped back into his body, but Utlapa had his knife at his throat and a hand covering his mouth. Taha Aki's body was strong, and Yut was weak with age. Yut could not say even one word to warn the others before Utlapa silenced him forever.**

**Taha Aki watched as Yut's spirit slipped away to the final lands that were barred to Taha Aki for all eternity. He felt great rage, more powerful than anything he'd felt before. He entered the big wolf again, meaning to rip Utlapa's throat out. But, as he joined the wolf, the greatest magic happened.**

**Taha Aki's anger was he anger of a man. The love he had for his people and the hatred he had for their oppressor were too vast for the wolf's body, too human. The wolf shuddered, and - before the eyes of the shocked warriors and Utlapa - transformed into a man.**

**The new man did not look like Taha Aki's body. He was far more glorious. He was the flesh interpretation of Taha Aki's spirit. The warriors recognized him at once, though, for they had flown with Taha Aki's spirit. **

**Utlapa tried to run, but Taha Aki had the strength of the wolf in his new body. He caught the thief and crushed the spirit from him before he could jump out of the stolen body. The people rejoiced when they understood what had happened. Taha Aki quickly set everything right, working again with his people and giving the young wives back to their families. The only change he kept in place was the end of spirit travels. He knew that it was too dangerous now that the idea of stealing a life was there. The spirit warriors were no more.**

**From that point on, Taha Aki was more than either wolf or man. They called him Taha Aki the Great Wolf, or Taha Aki the Spirit Man. He led the tribe for many, many years, for he did not age. When danger threatened, he would resume his wolf-self to fight or frighten the enemy. The people dwelt in peace." **

My father was so great at telling these stories, you could tell he loved them. He told them as if he were there, as if they were his own. As if his heart had lived then, and his eyes had saw all. But this time, his heart and his eyes were in two places within him. They were in the stories, as usual, but they were in me as well. His eyes would wander to me, Claire, or Kim every minute or so…when he mentioned the warriors or Taha Aki as the wolf-man. But he gave us serious stares as he told the end of the story, mostly to me.

**"Taha Aki fathered many daughters, and some of these found that, after they had reached the age of womanhood, they, too, could transform into wolves. The wolves were all different, because they were spirit wolves and reflected the person they were inside.**

**Some of the daughters became warriors with Taha Aki, and they no longer aged. Others, who did not like the transformation, refused to join the pack of wolf-women. These began to age again, and the tribe discovered that the wolf-women could grow old like anyone else if they gave up their spirit wolves. He had married a third wife after the deaths of the first two, and found in her his true spirit wife. Though he had loved the others, this was something else. He decided to give up his spirit wolf so that he would die when she did."**

Everyone was silent, completely engulfed in the story.

My mind was racing, wondering why my father was giving me such serious glares. It was as if he was trying to convey some message to me, some hidden message. Like a secret he was expecting me to figure out on my own. One of which, I'll tell you, had my head hurting like there was no tomorrow. All of this had my mind running a mile a minute, and I couldn't shake all the thoughts that were swarming like hornets in my head. Maybe I was thinking about this too hard, over thinking it. Then again, something inside me was telling me I wasn't. I looked around to see that Kim and Claire had just brushed everything off, as usual, thinking nothing of the stories except they were just old legends. And that the elders of the tribe were just superstitious. Which, honestly, I had to agree with. It was pretty stupid, and it made no since. That stuff couldn't have been true. Werewolves? Spirit Warriors? Sounds like something that you'd find on the page after you read about the Lochness Monster and mermaids. Just plain silly. But my dad seemed so serious, I didn't know what to think. Maybe Billy was crazy. As much as I hated it, I couldn't stop thinking about it. I became a prisoner to my thoughts.

* * *

I sat at the fire staring at it alone, absentmindedly roasting a marshmallow as everyone left for home. Why did he keep looking at me? Every time my father would mention the Spirit Warriors in the legends, he would look at us or Sam. And I mean, Sam was nice and all, but she was a little creepy. She was 20 years old, and she was always hanging around our family. And especially the council. They loved her. Almost worshipped the ground she walked on. For what, was beyond me. When Angel decided to move away and decided that maybe college wasn't completely for her, the council was in an uproar. But Sam graduated this year, and hasn't even thought about college, I'm sure of it. And the council was supposed to be all about college. How did Sam get off so easy? It's like she's their little pet. It's really weird.

And the way she looks at me…

It's the same look my dad gives.

Like they're waiting for something.

It's just…the way my dad looked at me. Whenever he mentioned the leader of the pack or spoke of my great-grandfather, Ephraim Black, he gave me that same weird look. What was he expecting from me? What did they all want from me? Why did it feel like there was something everybody knew, but I was the only one left in the dark? Like there was just some big clue I kept missing? I felt confused. I didn't know what do.

Some birthday this turned out to be.

"Are you trying to barbeque it?"

I jumped at the sudden voice and looked at my marshmallow. It was on fire. I blew at furiously and tossed it aside in the sand as the flame died, and Jacob laughed hysterically. He had snuck up sat beside me by the fire.

"You're not funny, Jake."

I answered upset. Jacob calmed down then smiled at me. I don't know why, but when he smiled at me my stomach felt funny.

"I'm sorry Jordan, happy birthday."

I just smiled, I knew I was turning red. "Thanks Jake."

For a second we stared at each other and the fire laminated his face. His skin was russet brown like mine, so smooth and his smile glowed. His long black hair cropped his face perfectly, and his brown eyes glimmered as the fire danced in them. Jacob was beautiful, and he made my stomach do flips.

I barely snapped out of it when he spoke.

"Um…I made you something." He went into his pocket and pulled out something. He took my hand and when he touched me, I felt sparks and currents travel all through me. Something magical was happening to me. He felt it too, I know he did. He had to. He was smiling just as hard as I was. He tied something on my wrist, and held it up for me to see. It was a beautifully woven red bracelet, with one single charm. A small wooden carved wolf, sitting tall and proud. It was gorgeous, I felt like crying.

I kissed Jacob on the cheek out of excitement and pulled him into a tight hug.

"Thank you, Jake. Thank you so much." I closed my eyes and enjoyed this moment, his hair smelled so good. His skin was warm, his touch was soft, his smile was sweet, and his personality was loving. He was perfect.

When we leaned out of hug, we stared at each other for a moment. And I could feel that the magic of the fire was affecting both of us. It was practically making his eyes sparkle. From then on, Jacob Clearwater was different.

He out his hand in my hair, slowly leaning towards me with his eyes closed. He kissed me so softly, so gently, I felt as if I would float away. It was heaven. My very first kiss.

After a lingering piece of perfection, he pulled away with his finger placed softly under my chin. He smiled that smile that made me do flips, and whispered "Happy Birthday."

Yeah, it was the best birthday ever.


	5. Chapter 4

**DISCLAIMER:** I don't own the fabulous characters or ideas of Twilight, Stephenie Meyer does. And she rocks. Need I saw more?

**Chapter Four: First Date**

"No, you're doing too much! She would wear her hair down!"

Claire was getting frustrated with Kim nagging at her back, but she couldn't be half as frustrated, nervous, anxious, agitated, all of it, the whole shebang, as I was. I had butterflies taking nose dives like eagles in my stomach.

"5 minutes."

Aunt Emily was just beaming at me. She couldn't have made me more nervous than when she did this. Then we heard the bell ring, and everyone looked at my face. Which I'm probably sure was pale white and horrified. "He's early," I whispered.

My aunt Emily went to get the door and sure enough, in walked Jacob and his mom. She was talking to Billy, who was shooting Jacob the death stare through quick sideways glances. Jacob looked like he was ready to run. That is until I got pushed out of my room by Claire and he saw me. He froze, and his jaw dropped to the floor the second he did. Did I look horrible? Was there something wrong? Did I have something on my dress? In my teeth? My mental panicking was interrupted when Billy cleared his throat and Jacob's jaw snapped shut.

"I'll expect her home by 11:00."

"Yes sir."

Jacob was just smiling at me, making me feel warm again. I swear I forgot everything around me when he did that. I'm pretty sure he felt it too, he probably heard only half of Billy's threats. He just kept smiling…at me.

"You look beautiful."

Oh, I knew I was red now.

Aunt Emily finally sprung us from Billy's wrath and we started heading out the door. Not without Jacob taking my hand in his, mind you. He was such a gentleman. It was like, a force pulling me to this guy.

"What are going to see?"

I could feel my heart pounding in my ears. Jacob always made me so nervous.

"The Blood Massacre. It's gory, but I think it'll be good. It's supposed to be scary, but if you scared you can hold on to me. I hope you like it."

All the weight was lifted from my shoulders, and I stopped feeling nervous. I couldn't stop myself from smiling.

"I've been wanting to see that movie since, like, forever."

I knew it. Not only was Jacob perfect,

We were perfect.

* * *

No need to tell you that the date went great, and that there was a lot of kissing when the lights went down in the theater. I couldn't even tell you what happened five minutes into the movie, I was so wrapped up in Jake.

We became a couple after that, and Jake was the sweetest boyfriend. He helped me with my homework, walked me to my classes, walked me home, everything. And I was always over his house as much as he was over mine. It sure helped that he stayed three houses down. I loved going over the Clearwaters. His mom was so sweet, and his dad was so funny. Jacob always thought he was corny, but I thought opposite. Jake looked just like his father, and laughed like him too. It's been a very good month.

"You better shut it or else you'll regret it."

I threatened. I was dead serious, and I was not to be taken lightly. Yet Jacob stood with that same smirk, instigating a rise out of me. He softly started to squeeze the trigger making a stream of water rise slowly up to me feet. My eyes shifted quietly to the knob on the wall, I contemplated running to turn it off but Jacob just gripped the water hose tighter.

"Don't even think about it."

His smirk was wider now. Ugh, he was jerk. I took my chances anyway, and he drenched me entirely with the water, getting it all over the garage. Then we fought for the hose and I got him wet, too. We were both soaking at the end of our match. It was so much fun washing the car when Jake came to help. By the end, we were both sitting against the car gasping to catch our breath. I shoved him smiling, then he shoved me back. He gave that look again, then he kissed me.

Did I tell you how much I love kissing?

Well I do, a lot.

We were interrupted when I heard my dad's voice call us up from the house. We both went running to see what was going on. When we got there, I felt my heart jump out my chest at what I saw.

"Brian!"

I ran over and gave my friend a hug, he'd grown about 2 feet since I'd last seen him.

"Oh, my god, I can't believe you're back!"

He just chuckled and softly hugged me back. I saw his dad Charlie and Billy smiling at us.

I stepped back and smiled at him, taking his image in. His eyes were golden now, and he was way more cuter than I remembered. I took Jacob's confused hand and introduced him.

"Jake, this is Brian and his dad Charlie. They live in Forks. We've known each other since we were little. They moved away a few years ago."

"And now we're back for good. I'd say three years was long enough to be in Phoenix." Charlie was smiling, his teeth were shinier than I remembered.

"Well they were just stopping through." Billy said happily. He was just as excited to have his old fishing buddy back.

"We thought a surprise visit was better than a phone call to let you know we were moving back." Brian smiled at me again.

I felt Jacob's hand in mine tighten, and I just squeezed back gently.

Brian gave me another hug, this one was tighter. He must've been working out, too, because his chest was harder.

"I missed you so much, Jordan." He said softly. I just hugged him back. I hated that he and Charlie had to move away. About three years ago they moved to Phoenix so Brian could be closer to his mom. Charlie was the Chief of Police in Forks, and he got transferred back, and I hope they stay for good. I've missed my friend. We grew up together. Charlie and my dad have been fishing buddies since before we were born. Brian was only a year older than me, and as I recall he'd never let me forget it.

* * *

Jacob's POV

I don't like this. I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm understanding when it comes to friends but this guy was pulling out my jealous boyfriend side. And I have every right, right? There's something fishy about him. The way he's looking at her is screaming "more than friends". And she cant even see it. Well I see it. Because I'm a guy, too. Not to mention I've been looking at Jordan that way since we turned 12.

Then, the jerk pulled her into this crushing hug and told her, "_I missed you so much Jordan._" Even his voice is annoying. It screams creep. Watching this was like torture, I just wanted to hit him so hard he wouldn't wake up till next week. It was making my stomach churn.

Why is he holding her so long? I mean, I know they haven't seen each other in a while, but really is three years all that long? Is it that big of deal? I think not. And-oh my god, wait…

Did he ju-…did he just smell her hair?

**Did he REALLY just _smell her hair_?** And it wasn't a friendly sniff either, it was one of those deep, smiling, I'm-secretly-in-love-with-you smells. The guy looked like he was in heaven.

That was it. That was all it took. Now I was so mad to the point where it hurt.

"Hey Jordan, come on we have to finish washing the car."

My voice probably came out more stressed than I meant for it to, but I was talking through a clenched jaw. Talking through your teeth while trying to come off as calm wasn't easy.

Jordan leaned out of the hug.

**FINALLY.**

Thank god.

"Oh, right. We do have to finish. Sorry, Brian. But call and we'll hang out."

"I will." he said happily, almost like he sang it.

Yeah, I bet you will.

_I will too_, I thought. I'll be right there, you stupid creep.

"Come on, Brian." Charlie had already started walking for his police cruiser.

Brian waved one last time then they left. And we went back to washing the car. And lets just say, there was a lot of water-fighting. Meaning a lot of threats, a lot executions, and a lot of kiss- I mean, making up afterwards.


	6. Chapter 5

**DISCLAIMER:** I don't own the fabulous characters or ideas of Twilight, Stephenie Meyer does. And she rocks. Need I saw more?

**Chapter Five: Strange Days**

"How old is she?"

I couldn't look up from my plate, the subject was so uncomfortable. But I had to know, the topic had been racking my brain for a while now.

"She's 18." Billy wasn't looking up from his plate either. Like father like daughter, I guess.

"She sure doesn't…look 18. She looks like, 20 something…"

"Has she done something wrong?"

Leave it to my dad to come to the defense of the golden child, Samantha Uley. I always knew the people of La Push looked to my father like the chief, since it's our lineage. But it's just dawning on me how much authority he has, he has a strong voice on the council. In fact, the strongest. My dad was the head. And people respected everything he said. So when it comes to Sam, people accepted her because my dad did.

"No, she hasn't done anything wrong…she just…I don't know. Dad, she's a little weird. I mean, come on, you know no normal 18-year-old looks like that. She looks like a freakin' supermodel. And the way she looks at me. At all of us. Claire and Kim included. It's just…creepy. And she's always like…I don't know how else to say it…watching over us. Like some sort of strange protector or something."

He finally looked up now.

"Jordan, what are you saying?"

"I'm saying, did you put her up to it? Everybody listens to you. What did you tell her? What did you tell her to do?"

He got really silent, like he was deep in thought. He made a face of sadness, which I completely did not understand.

"Samantha Uley is an outstanding young woman, she's very strong, and she's just looking out for the young ones of our tribe. She's been through a lot, and I can only hope you'll come out to be a fine young lady like her."

That silenced me for the rest of the night. She's been through a lot? What has she been through? I don't know a lot about her. Just that her and her mom have a house a little ways from here. But that wasn't even the gut-punch.

He wanted me to be like _her_?

She's just…odd. I mean, don't get me wrong, she's beautiful. She really does look like a supermodel. She's about 6'5 going on 7', she's got long beautiful black hair that reaches to her shoulder blades, smooth skin and a beautiful smile. She's just…really muscular. Not a scary looking muscular, but a beautiful one. She looked powerful. Intimidating. And she rarely spoke. To anyone, really, unless they were on the council. She keeps to herself. But lately, she's been sort of watching us. I mean, it's weird enough we have a 22-year-old looking woman who's actually a senior on the school bus with us and at school with us everyday, but she stares at us all the time on top of that? She looks like she belongs in Paris somewhere. Not in La Push. And she takes it upon herself to intervene if we're about to get into trouble. It's really annoying.

* * *

It was raining today. And I haven't stopped crying. It's so sad. Everyone in La Push was crying. I couldn't believe it happened so close to La Push, it was so scary. I mean, right in our own backyard. Everyone was in fear. As usual Billy had to be the strong one, he portrayed no emotions at all really. The most he did when he heard the news was sigh, I saw it in his eyes, but his features didn't betray his strong front. Well I cried like a baby.

A little boy who'd ran away from home in Forks was found dead on one of the trails near La Push. He was attacked by some sort of animal. He was just 7 years old. His family was all over the news, they were so heartbroken. His mother looked so lost, it hurt down to my soul. His name was Anthony.

Right here, near La Push. Something dangerous was lurking in the woods around our Reservation, and it was attacking innocent people. It's just wrong.

We found out at school, and all the kids' parents wanted them to come straight home. La Push was in a panic. But I got home to a major surprise.

I walked through my front door to find the entire Council having a meeting in my living room, Samantha Uley included with my father smack-dab in the middle. Harry Clearwater looked upset, and Old Henry Ateara just looked resolved. Sam looked remorseful, and my dad didn't look anything. Sam was just looking at me, again.

But this meeting was different. There were new faces in attendance. One was a girl, she had to be about 6', she had reddish-brown hair and green eyes. She had high cheek bones and smooth dark skin. She looked beautiful too, like Sam. And the other girl was just about the same height, maybe a little shorter. Her hair was short and brown, matching her big chocolate eyes. She wasn't as built as the other girl, she looked sweeter, too. The one with the green eyes just looked angry.

Who are these people, and why were they in my house.

I walked back out the house and went to Kim's house, and Aunt Emily couldn't make sense of it either.

* * *

I realized that both of those girls went to school with us, just like Sam, and now Sam had followers. They were silent, just like her, older looking, just like her, and always watching.

**Just. Like. Her.**

Well, it was a little different now. Sam stopped watching us as much, but the shorter new girl took up her mantle. We found out her name was Lauren, and she was one of the most popular girls in the 11th grade. She was like, just 16. She had a group of friends, and word was that she flipped out one day, was gone for a week then came back hanging out with Sam. She acted totally different, and completely ignored everyone. Only doing what Sam told her to. And now, she's following us.

The same story goes for the other new girl, Maya, but she wasn't as sweet as Lauren used to be. Maya is in the 10th grade, and she's had a lot fights at our school. She would always fight with someone for the simplest things. It was like she had no self-control whatsoever. She really had temper problems. And the same thing happened to her. One day, she was about to fight again with some girl for not paying her back her money from a bet they had on one of her other fights, and Sam stepped in and pulled her off before she could even touch her.

Maya did the same thing, she followed Sam around doing whatever she said. And what's weirder, as if them looking alike wasn't enough, they all wore the same short haircut now. It was cute, but Sam had it one day then they came back with it the next. It was just…strange.

Why did they follow Samantha like that? Why did they do everything she told them? They'd be ready to knock someone's head off, but Sam would put her hand on their shoulder and shake her head, and they'd calm down and walk away like nothing happened. She'd give them a look, and they'd understand like they were speaking some secret language. It was like they were…

A cult.

Or something.

* * *

We were standing outside of the store and Samantha Uley and her cult came by. Maya bumped into me, and I shoved her back.

"Watch where you're going." I wasn't about to back down from her because she was a few inches taller than me. And stronger looking.

"Stay out of my way." She didn't even say the words, she spat them. She was a person that walked around looking mad all the time. Like she was constantly pissed at the world. Well that still didn't give her a right to be rude.

I was sick of it, sick of their whole group and Kim and Claire were tired also. So they had my back. If Maya wanted to fight, she'd have to take all three of us.

And we got the result we wanted, because she made her angry look like she was ready for war. But this time was different from the other times we'd seen her fight. A violent shudder traveled through her body and her eyes were filled with a rage redder than the sun. We stepped back once, a little scared. She was freakin' crazy. Till Sam put her hand on her shoulder telling her to calm down, then she just brushed it off. They went into the store like nothing happened.

I know very well the three of us could've taken Maya by herself...maybe not Maya, Lauren, and Sam…but surely just Maya. We didn't need Sam's protection. We could handle ourselves.

That just pushed me over the edge.

* * *

"Why hasn't your dad done something about this?"

Jake and I were on the phone talking, and he felt the same way I did about Sam. He thought she was weird.

"Well, he acts the same way Billy does about her. He just takes up for her."

"My dad has to be blind or something, she's making kids follow her. Like she's started some stupid gang. She's doing something, and everybody acts like nothing's happening."

"Babe, don't worry. Everything will be fine."

"What if she comes after me next, Jacob? What then? I don't want to follow her. She's probably crazy. I don't want to become one of her zombies. I don't want to lose you, I lov-"

I stopped mid-sentence, realizing what I was about to say. I knew it was true, I knew it down to my heart, but was I ready to say it? Was I ready for him to hear it? Was I ready to let him know?

"What? Jordan…were you about to say…"

He'd caught on when I'd hoped he didn't, then he stopped in the middle of his sentence.

But being scared of telling him how I really feel about him wasn't going to work right now. If I needed anything right now, it was him. Because I was scared and Jake was the only one who could calm me down.

"Jacob…I know you probably don't feel the same way yet, or maybe not even yet, probably not ever, and I really hope this doesn't mess up our relationship, but I need to say this. I love you, and I don't want to lose you."

The phone was silent and I felt my heart stop. It was a mistake. He didn't feel the same way.

"Jordan, I love you too. And you won't lose me. I could never walk away from you, and I won't let Samantha Uley and her friends hurt you. I promise."

I felt so much better when I finally heard that.

* * *

I'm just glad I wasn't the only one going through this, because Kim and Claire were also feeling the same way.

"Maybe she makes them sacrifice chickens or something…"

"That's stupid Claire."

We were arguing about what Samantha Uley could possibly be doing to those poor girls. Well, to Lauren. Maya probably needed what she was getting.

"I think she's just picking up kids like their rocks, and nobody's saying anything about it. The council just ignores it, Billy acts like he doesn't even see it. Why is this okay?"

I was frustrated now, this was becoming a situation quickly and nobody was acting on a resolution.

"You guys…what if…she tries to come after one of us next?"

I heard my heart drop to my feet, that had been the one fear in my mind I was too afraid to speak. But everybody was thinking the same thing.

"That's stupid Claire," Kim was afraid. That's why she was brushing it off. She'd been thinking about it too.

"I mean, think about it. It all makes sense. She's always watching us, always around."

Claire had a good point. She was always around.

"She's always at your house, Jordan. Maybe you're next."

There was no humor in her statement, she was dead serious. And it sounded like a wall of glass was shattering right next to my ear because she was right. She was always around me. Always watching me. Okay, now I'm scared for my life.

"Well, no matter what…I am NEVER joining her cult. I will never be friends with Samantha Uley."

"Damn right." Claire was confident.

"Me either," Kim added.

I didn't have to worry about losing my best friends, my sisters, to any cult. We were together forever. I didn't want to become one of her zombies.

As confident as I was in the fact that I would never join Sam's little cult, I was completely unprepared for what happened next. All of us were.

* * *

**REVIEW PLEASE! AND IF YOU ARE A READER, SORRY ABOUT THE DELAY. MY INTERNET WAS DOWN.**


	7. Chapter 6

**DISCLAIMER:** I don't own the fabulous characters or ideas of Twilight, Stephenie Meyer does. And she rocks. Need I saw more?

**Chapter SIX: WHAT IS HAPPENING TO ME**

Kim's POV

I woke up feeling a little under the weather. My head was throbbing a little, and I felt really clammy and sweaty. My hair was meshed to my sweaty forehead, making me feel all the more dirty. I know Mondays made everybody feel like crap, but this was just ridiculous. And my chest was hurting, really bad. Not like my chest, like breathing or whatever, but my…_chest_. I know. Weird.

I turned a little to look at me clock, I was going to be late for school. But as much as I wanted to, I really couldn't move an inch. On schedule, my mom knocked on the door.

"Kim? Baby, it's 7:10. School starts in 20 minutes, and I don't hear the shower running. Did you oversleep? I'm coming in."

She peered in through the crack of my door as she opened it slowly, and her eyes grew big with worry. I guess I looked as horrible as I felt. She immediately ran over to me with that concerned, motherly gleam in her eye.

"Oh, you're sick. How do you feel? Do you feel achy? Clammy? Nauseous? Tell me?"

She put her hand to my forehead and pulled it back quickly, amazed at how hot I was. I replaced her hand immediately. Was I really that hot? I didn't feel any different to myself.

She raced out the room and returned a minute later with a cool rag, some cold apple juice, and a thermometer. She put the cover on it and stuck it under my tongue, nearly stabbing me with it.

When it beeped she snatched it out, and looked scared at the results.

"103.5," she whispered breathlessly.

That cant be right.

She took my hand in hers and looked me directly in the eye, making me really scared. What was going on? What was wrong with me?

"Okay princess, I want you to look me in my eye and tell me everything that's wrong with you."

I sighed, feeling a little weak.

"Well…I feel really clammy and achy all over, my head hurts a little, and my chest hurts."

Her hands immediately flew to my chest.

"Are you having trouble breathing?"

"No, I mean like…my _chest_."

I gestured with my hands, and she realized with a soft 'oh'.

She went into the kitchen to phone the doctor while I force-fed myself the chicken-noodle soup she made me, and I listened to her conversation. While she sounded like she was freaking out over what may be wrong with me, the pleas she was making were making the doctor seem as if she didn't think it was that big of a deal.

She hung up the phone, and turned to me. By now I had made my way to the kitchen, and I was sitting on a stool at the island in the center.

"She says she doesn't think it's anything more harmful than a bug, and you should be back to normal in a few days. A week tops."

"Well that's good." I didn't want to be sick forever.

"I'm keeping you from school as long as your sick, and I'll stay home to take care of you. And I'm sorry, but that also means no seeing the girls either. Wouldn't want them to catch it too."

That was when I sighed. I hadn't expected that. I wouldn't be able to see Jordan and Claire? That's unfair. All because of some silly bug. Stupid, lousy, rotten bug.

"Maybe you should lay down on the couch, and I'll bring you a blanket."

"After I take a shower, I feel disgusting." I said over my shoulder as I slowly made my way back to my bedroom.

* * *

Incredibly, after a warm shower I felt amazing better. Better than better, actually. I went in the living room, put the t.v. on cartoons, and relaxed comfortably under a blanket. The blanket was actually making me unbearably hot, but I did it for my mom's sake. I didn't feel like arguing with her about it. She took my temperature again, and marveled at it, it was still the same. She gave me some cold medicine and we waited.

At about 2 o'clock I was hungry again, it was past time for lunch. No, not hungry, strike that. Starving. I felt as if I could eat the entire fridge if I wanted. Luckily, my mom was already in the kitchen making grilled cheese sandwiches.

"Mom, make mine four." She looked at me as if I had a third eye or two heads.

"Four? Four sandwiches? Are you sure you're not delusional? I'll take you to the hospital in Forks if--"

"No mom, I'm fine. I'm just really hungry."

I could feel myself getting warmer, she must've had the heat turned up in the house. Probably from thinking I was cold. But this was, like, abnormally hot house temperature. Did she have the oven on, too? Was she baking something? I didn't smell it. And I can smell everything. By now, I had already shed my flannel pajama pants and my robe. Now all I was in was a tank, and some shorts and I was still scorching hot. I could feel myself starting to sweat. What was going on, and why was it so hot in here?

"I'm sorry, but I just don't think you'd eat four grilled cheese sandwiches--"

"Why would I not eat it, mom?" My voice was sharp. She was starting to make me mad.

"It's just a lot of food, Kimmy."

"But I told you I would eat it! God, why do you always do this? You do this with everything! You try to control every aspect of my life! You do what you think is best for me, making my decisions for me, not letting me do any thinking of my own!"

"Kim, I'm sor--"

**"DON'T SAY YOU'RE SORRY, BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT! YOU'VE ALWAYS DONE THIS! SINCE I WAS LITTLE! YOU DO IT ALL THE TIME! LIKE, LIKE, LIKE THE OTHER DAY WHEN WE WENT SHOPPING. I ASKED YOU FOR THE TOOTHPASTE THAT WAS CINNAMON FLAVORED, AND YOU TOLD ME NO BECAUSE I WOULDN'T LIKE IT. I _LIKE_ CINNAMON, MOM! IF YOU HAVEN'T NOTICED,** (I grabbed my purse off the counter, quickly rummaging around for evidence. I found it and held it up) **I CHEW BIG RED! _BIG RED_, MOM!!!"  
**

I glanced quickly from my mom's scared and shocked eyes to the packet I was holding up. All of the sudden I felt a rage, a horrible rage, build deep within me. I felt my body shake violently as tremors traveled down my spine. My hands were shaking so badly I dropped my purse and all it's contents spilled out onto the floor, my eyes were heavily transfixed on the packet in my hand.

I glanced at my mother's mouth, and saw her jam move in a slight chewing motion. I spoke through clenched teeth, feeling my anger about to explode out of my ears.

**"****YOU CHEWED MY LAST _PIECE_?!?!?!?!?!"**

I could no longer contain it. I let out an earsplitting scream as my eyes snapped shut and I fell to my knees, my body was shaking out of control now. My bones shuddered within my body, sending me into a world of pain. It felt as if my brain was expanding against my skull, making me cry out helplessly. I felt like dying. I couldn't breathe, and my heart felt like it was going to burst from beating so fast.

I felt as if I was going to explode, from the inside out.

I fought whatever was happening to me, and ran out into the backyard. I was attempting at running into the woods, but what was happening to me wouldn't let me get that far.

I exploded from the inside, feeling fur explode from every inch of my body. My brain was screaming against it, but I couldn't stop it. It was the worst thing I'd ever felt, ever.

I tried to scream out in agony, but it came different. To my ears, it sounded like a loud and angry howl that shook the entire woods and neighborhood, and my whole world exactly.

**What. The. Hell.**

I took off like lightning into the woods, hoping to escape my problems and what was happening. I felt as if I just died. Either that, or I'd gone completely insane. I was completely deranged, and nothing would ever be the same. I was hoping it was the first option. Because death, hell, anything would be better than this.

I ran as far and as fast as my legs could take me, which was both incredibly far and incredibly fast. I had no clue where I was going, but I had to get away from here. After a few minutes, the most bizarre event of today happened. And trust me, today had totally been bizarre so far.

_"Stop running. It's okay."_

I heard a voice in my head which completely caught me off guard, and I ran head first into a tree. I heard a laughing in my head, and I shook it to try and regain composure. And sanity. Or sense. Okay, now I knew it. I was bananas. Bring on the straitjacket, padded rooms, and cubed jello. I took off running to nowhere in particular again.

I heard the laughing again, but this time I heard the calm voice speak at the same time.

_"You're not crazy Kim."_

Kim? They knew my name? What was going on? How did they know me? Had I been abducted by aliens that were observing me and were experimenting on me?

The laughter got even more enthusiastic, and my throbbing headache got worse as a result.

_"Kim, you watch way too much t.v. You were not abducted by aliens, and you're not crazy."_

Okay, so two options out the window. I halted completely as I realized only the third option was left, leaving only the third option to be true. I felt myself tearing up and I tried to cry, but it came out sounding like a dog had whimpered.

I was dead.

_"No, you're not dead either."_

The voice was a lot louder now, and I turned around to see 3 gigantic wolves surrounding me. I backed up into a tree, fearing for my life. The biggest one was black, and it took a step toward me making me shake with fear. I realized now, that since I wasn't already dead, the three abnormally large wolves practically salivating at the mouth for my death would kill. So why not go out with a fight?

It took another slow step forward and this time I reacted, trying to make an intimidating face and growling at it. A snarl rolled out from between my teeth, shaking the trees. I froze, surprised at the third dog-like sound to come from me today. Huh?

_"What am I?"_

I was too lost in my own thoughts of confusion to be worried about the danger I was in.

_"We're not going to hurt you, Kim."_

The silver wolf to it's left shook it's head, clearly out of boredom or frustration.

_"This is boring, and it's taking too long."_

A new voice rang through my head. It was annoying, and impatient. I quickly recognized it as the voice that had been laughing minutes ago.

_"Quiet, this is hard for her."_ The bigger black wolf spoke up, and they both turned to it.

_"Yeah, and let's not forget the first time you phased."_ The brown wolf on the right added, and immediately my mind was flooded with images of a tall, dark-skinned girl with reddish-brown hair screaming out in pain and fury, clutching her head. As if someone just plugged in the audio cord, a string of profanities vocalized the video making the silver wolf cringe. I could see embarrassment in it's green eyes. That voice stayed silent.

_"What am I?"_ Fear had already leaked out of my voice, and I felt myself shaking again.

_"You are a werewolf."_ The voice spoke again, and the big black one took a step forward.

By now it's paw was where my right hand should be, so I looked down at it. I saw two paws, the bigger black one and a smaller sandy colored paw. My eyes trailed from the paw up, and realized it was attached to me. My whole body was covered in sandy fur. Even my tail was, my tail? _My tail_?! **I had a tail?! This can _NOT_ be happening. **

_"It's going to be okay, Kim. You're not alone. Now you're one of us."_ The voice answered my frantic freak-out session, and all the puzzle pieces in my mind started to come together. It was so familiar. One of us. One of them. It was at that moment I realized who this was, and what it meant.

_"Samantha Uley."_

The big black wolf nodded it's head, as if to tell me I'm correct.

_"And Lauren."_ The brown wolf let out a low howl. _"And Maya."_ The silver wolf with no patience nodded.

_"Hey, I heard that."_ Maya said, before grimacing her muzzle at me, showing a row of pearly white incisors shaped like daggers in a perfectly aligned row. I did the same back at her, showing I wasn't scared. Werewolf or not, I could still take her.

_"Still have a short temper, I see? You're still all bark and no bite." _I still hadn't let go of the fight we almost had, I wanted it more than anything.

_"Take that back!"_ She was ready to bite my face off.

_"Not a chance!"_ I screamed back as I growled at her, a low menacing noise that erupted from deep within my chest.

**_"Hey you two. Calm down. That's enough."_** Her voice had something extra as she said this, some sort of tenor or authority in it that shocked me for a second.

And right as I was about to attack Maya, I felt some force shock through my system preventing me from attacking Maya. I tried to fight it, but it too painful. My mind scrambled as I tried to figure out this hold on my muscles and movement.

_"Sam's the alpha. Whatever she says, we have to do. She's a leader of the pact."_ Lauren was trying to calm me down and give up fighting it, and I subsided shortly after.

The pact? Is that what we're called the pact? Now I was part of the pact? I felt sorrow wash over me as I accepted what I was. I had became one of the cult members. My thoughts immediately flashed to Jordan and Claire.

_"You can't speak to them anymore Kim, I'm sorry." _Her voice sounded so apologetic.

Now I was scared, upset, and heartbroken.

_"What? What, why?"_

_"Because you could hurt them. You could easily harm them and it's not the easiest thing to deal with once you've put your loved ones in danger. I'm sorry, but it's the only way."_

_"How is that the only way!! How come I can't talk to them??"_

_"If it'll help you feel better, they should be pretty close to phasing really soon."_ Lauren was just trying to help, but that just sent me into full panic/shock mode.

_"They'll be a monster, **too**!?!? I don't want them to have to be this!! I don't want them to have to go through this!!"_

And with that I took off running, again. To where, I don't know. I didn't even care. As long as I got away from them. From this whole situation.

_"Come one guys, let's give her some privacy."_

That was the last thought I heard other than my own for the next two days.


	8. Chapter 7

**Chapter SEVEN: ACCEPTANCE**

After 2 days of nonstop running, I accepted that this was my fate and I eventually calmed down. Some time over the night I came across a river and got to look at my reflection for the first time, I was a monster. A big, furry, evil monster. And there was nothing I could do to change it. I would be stuck like this forever.

Then I heard it.

"Kim, it's time to come home. You're mom's worried sick."

My mom. I hadn't even thought about her. She had to be worried about me. I felt tears building in chest at how I'd acted last time I was with her. I said all those awful things. I blew up at her over a stick of gum, for god sakes. A stick of gum! I really was a monster. I let out the saddest howl you've ever heard.

"You didn't mean it, and she knows that. After you left, I called the elders to go over and talk to her. She knows about everything that's happening, and she knows it not your fault. She forgives you. She just wants you to come home."

"The elders?"

"Billy Black, Harry Clearwater, and Henry Ateara."

"Now play close attention Kim. I'm going to show you how to phase back."

About two hours later, I finally got it and I was human again. I felt a breeze. I looked down, and I was naked. To my horror, Sam was naked too. Before I could scream or say anything, she passed me some cut off shorts and a tank top. The shorts were short shorts, not like boy cut-offs. 

We ran back to my house, and my mom gave me the biggest hug ever. I just cried as she did, feeling so sorry for what I'd done to her. For what I'd become. 

It was then that the elders explained to me everything that had happened, and why I had become what I am. And they also confirmed I couldn't even speak to Jordan and Claire anymore. I was only aloud to speak to them, my mom, and the pack. Talk about murder through lack of social life.

-

Claire's POV

"Maybe she's just been sick. We could surprise her." Jordan was trying to suggest ideas about Kim. Truthfully, I was out of them. We hadn't heard from her for four days, last time we spoke to her it was Sunday. It is now Thursday. This isn't like Kim. She doesn't just ignore us.

"No good. Her mom said she cant see anyone, and she can barely talk."

"But aunt Em would let us see her, right? I mean, she's our best friend."

"She didn't sound like she would. But she said she should be back at school by Monday."

And boy, what a day Monday was.

On the school bus, we got on and saved an open seat for Kim with us and she walked straight past us like she didn't see us. We said her name, and she ignored it. That's not even the worse part.

She walked to the back of the bus and sat next to Maya. Yeah that's right, Maya. Maya!

We were outraged. 

It was then we noticed she even looked a little different. She had cut her hair like them, and she sat quietly just like they did. No, I take that back. Sam made a joke about something, and she laughed with the three of them. Like she was one of them. What was going on?

She wouldn't talk to us, she acted like we didn't exist, she would accept our phone calls, and she sat in the back by herself in all of her classes now. Unless she had it with one of them.

It hurt, and it hurt bad. Kim was the one saying she would never join their cult, and now she was their newest member. Was she on drugs? Did they convince her to take drugs? No, that could never happen. Sam was against drugs, in fact she patrolled the beaches whenever the Forks kids came down to party, and stopped them from selling drugs to the Rez kids. She acted like a freakin' saint. What was going on.

To make matters worse, I got the news of a lifetime when I got home.

"What?"

My mom looked like didn't know how to deliver the news, suspecting I would handle it poorly when I received it. Well, she was right.

"I'm getting married, Claire. He's a wonderful guy, and you're going to love him."

"No mom, you're going to love him. Not me. How long have you known him? Why is this the first time I'm hearing anything about it? I didn't even know you were dating!!! You've been keeping the truth from me!! Mom, how could you!! You can't do this!"

She was crying now. Well, it serves her right. I was crying too. This hurt.

"I just felt like this was the best way to let you know."

"Mom, you just dropped it on me! How is that the best way?"

"Claire baby, it's not that bad. He's from Phoenix, and he has a son that's your age. They'll be moving in in a few weeks."

"They're moving IN!?! How come you cant go live there, and I'll stay here!"

"I'm sorry Claire. This will be a major change for everybody, so it's best that you just accept it. That's the best way to get through it."

And with that, she left me crying in my room.

How could she? Did she only think about herself? Is that all she cared about? What about how I feel? What about what I want? What about what I need?

Sadly, I wasn't the only one who's world was shattering before their very eyes.


	9. Chapter 8

**DISCLAIMER:** I don't own the fabulous characters or ideas of Twilight, Stephenie Meyer does. And she rocks. Need I saw more?

**Chapter EIGHT: FAIR WARNING**

Jordan's POV

I'd been feeling different, no strike that, downright sick since all of this mess happened with Kim. Jacob seemed to blow it off, and that was angering me. Plus his comments about how I was physically changing were beginning to annoy me. Don't get me wrong, I love Jake with all of my heart, but it's just becoming hard to be with him.

"I just don't think it's that big of a deal, you shouldn't stress over it Jor, if she wants to hang out with them now, good riddens." Jake was trying to help, but he was making me madder.

"Jacob, she's my cousin. That's my blood. And she's acting like we're nothing. How can you expect me to let something like that go?" My words were sharper than my thoughts had been, and he picked up on that.

"You know what Jordan, what's going on. Ever since all of this happened you've been acting really crabby, and I don't know what to do anymore. It's like everything I say just makes you mad and you start yelling. It's becoming really annoying."

"Maybe because things you say are stupid and insensitive sometimes, Jake! Ever thought of that?!?"

"You know what, forget it Jordan. Because now you're just acting stupid."

I knew our argument could be heard all over his house, and I heard someone coming to break it up.

But Jacob made me really mad when he called me stupid. Like, _really_ mad.

**"DID YOU JUST CALL ME STUPID!?!? YOU'RE STUPID, JAKE!! YOU'RE THE ONE ACTING STUPID!! WHY DON'T YOU JUST SEE WHAT I'M TRYING TO SAY TO YOU!! SOMETHING IS GOING ON, AND YOU'RE ACTING LIKE NOTHING IS HAPPENING! YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE THERE FOR ME!"**

By now his dad had came in the room, and he looked really scared. Jacob didn't look as scared, but he looked scared too.

I felt myself get really hot, and angry. My hands were shaking, and I couldn't control it. I don't know what was happening to me. It was scary.

I ran out of the door leaving a dumbfounded angry Jake and a horrified angry Mr. Clearwater.

I heard him yelling at my back.

**"STAY AWAY FROM MY SON, JORDAN BLACK. YOU ARE NEVER TO SEE HIM AGAIN. DO YOU HEAR ME? YOU'VE BEEN GIVEN FAIR WARNING."**

I just ran home and hid behind my garage until I calmed down. What was happening to me? And what was that? I had never been that angry in my life. It felt like something was building inside of me. I was really scared. I felt like hurting Jake, and I would never hurt Jake. Never. No matter how mad I was at him.

What was wrong with me?

When I finally gathered myself I went in the house to see Billy looking upset.

He was just staring at the t.v., not really paying attention to it. This was something he did when he was so mad, he couldn't think straight.

"Dad, what's wrong."

He finally noticed me and squared his eyes. I guess Harry had called him. I should've expected this.

"You are never to speak to Jacob Black again, do you hear me Jordan?"

I felt the tears.

"But why? Dad, it was one little stupid argument. I didn't mean--"

"Never, Jordan. Am I clear?"

I looked down at my shoes as the tears fell, not willing to let him see them.

"Yes, sir."

I started to walk for my room, and he said something else.

"The same goes for Brian. You are never to see Brian Swan again. Or Charlie for that matter. They're liars."

That one, I did not expect. It caught me completely off guard. Why couldn't I speak to Brian? I knew he seemed a little different the last time I saw him, but he was liar? What was he lying about?


	10. Chapter 9

**DISCLAIMER:** I don't own the fabulous characters or ideas of Twilight, Stephenie Meyer does. And she rocks. Need I saw more?

**Chapter Nine: True Love**

It had been 3 days since I last saw Jake. Since our argument. I understood that he didn't want to see me anymore, but the pain was unreal. I was crying myself to sleep every night, and I was a zombie during the day. Not even Claire could get through to me. Nothing could make me feel better.

All I could think about were those hurtful things I said to him and how sorry I was, I wished I could take them back. I wished none of this happened.

Late that night, I was staring up at the full moon through my window. It a beautiful glow into my dark room, and it made me think about Jacob's smile. Jacob was my first love. I felt the tears coming again, and didn't even bother to wipe them. I just looked at the bracelet he made me, regretting all the wrong I'd ever done to him.

Then I heard it.

There was a light tapping on my window. I looked up at it, and saw a dark figure outside my window. I got scared, but then I could see the figure's smile. I knew who it was then. And that smile was meant just for me.

I slowly opened it and climbed out, as he helped me.

Then I looked up at him. Jacob, and his eyes still danced just for me. I buried my face in his chest as he held me, and I cried my eyes out.

"I'm so sorry Jake, I didn't mean it. I'm so sorry…"

"Shh…it's okay Jordan. I'm sorry too. I missed you so much."

I looked up at his face and he wiped away my tears with his thumb, and smiled that half smile I loved. I softly kissed his lips and he cradled my face with his hands, making me feel like I was floating.

He ended the kiss, which ended way too soon in my eyes.

"I love you Jordan. And nothing will keep me from you. I'll sneak out every night if I have to."

And he held me.

It was then that I realized I really didn't deserve Jake. He had such a good heart, and he was so forgiving. Even when you didn't deserve to be forgiven, he still did. He was so gentle, and warm, and kind, and loving. He was perfect. I loved Jacob with all my heart.

And we continued to hide our relationship, vowing to never let anything tear us apart.

* * *

Sam's POV

I had the day off, and I decided to go down to first beach to clear my thoughts. It was a pretty windy day, so there shouldn't have been anyone on the beach. The water was so calming, and the sun was setting on the horizon beautifully. The wind blew my hair magically, and I let the feeling take me away. I rarely got to relax like this anymore, so I decided to take it in.

My life was not easy, and it was lonely to say the least.

I heard about what happened with Jordan and Jacob, and it's sad. She was so close to phasing right there in front of him, Harry put her out and told her she could never see him again. People lie when they say what you don't know won't hurt you. Because Jordan had absolutely no clue about what she was, yet it had torn her away from her only love.

She would soon realize that she was subject to this dark lonely fate, just like me. And love doesn't role around for us. It's not easy. She would have to give up Jake sooner or later. And I couldn't blame Harry. He just didn't want his son to get hurt.

I closed my eyes trying to free my mind of everything, of every responsibility, of every worry, letting the wind magically blow my hair and carry my troubles away.

Then I heard a click.

I ignored it, until I heard it again.

This time I opened my eyes, and peered all the way down to the other end of the beach. I thought I was alone. A man was on the rocks at the edge of the waves, and he was taking nature photos.

He was leaning over pretty far to get his shot, and I thought he was going to fall over. I brushed it off thinking he wasn't that stupid, until I heard a sudden splash.

I took off like lightning to rescue him, the strongest of human swimmers wouldn't be able to fight the current today.

I dived in the water and he was already sinking to the bottom, I had to swim fast.

I pulled him up to the surface, and swam us to the beach.

I pulled up on the sand and started to pump to get the water out of his system. I hadn't even looked up at his face, saving him was more important. After a few seconds he coughed up most of the water, and started choking. I pulled him up to a sitting position and patted his back, helping him out. When he finished, I softly laid him back on his back. I was angry now.

"Are you alright? You could've killed yourself."

He tried to laugh but it ended up coming out like another choking noise.

"All to get a picture of the pretty girl."

I hadn't even noticed he never let go of his camera, and a picture of me with my eyes closed and my hair blowing in the wind was on the screen.

"You were photographing me?"

He gave me a weak smile, and I really looked at his face for the first time. He had blue eyes and blond hair, and a beautiful smile. He had beautiful pink lips, and he was taller than me. He was a little built, and his skin was pale from the water. He must've been freezing.

When our eyes met, I felt everything in my world shift. It felt like there was no such thing as gravity, no such thing as air, the only thing tying me to this world was him. The only reason I was breathing was him. He was my reason. I felt like everything I had to do from here on out, I had to do for him. I smiled at him, getting lost in his eyes. He smiled back at me.

"A photo worth dying for."


	11. Chapter 10

**Chapter NINE: COMPLICATED**

Claire's POV

I walked in the house to grab few Capri suns, today was record hot. Well, at least it felt like it to me. I was sweating like I was in an oven.

My mom walked into the kitchen and I continued with my business, ignoring her as if she doesn't exist like I've been doing since the day she told me she was going to be marrying Henry Home-wrecker. She leaned against the counter was crossed her arms, she was waiting for me to get out of the fridge.

I fished out four Capri Suns and closed the door, then leaned against the counter facing the windows, drinking happily as if she wasn't standing there.

"Four?"

I ignored her comment. I was really thirsty.

"So this is how you're going to act? You're acting really immature, Claire Lisa Taylor. You're going to ignore me for the rest of our days, aren't you."

I wore an indifferent expression, giving her the silent answer of "hell yes."

"Claire we need to talk about this, you can't go on like this forever."

I squeezed the last out of the first pouch and crushed it in my hands with a satisfied "Ahhh", then started on the next one.

"Fine, you can ignore me all you want. But I know you're listening. You WILL hear me, Claire. I am your mother!"

That's when I couldn't take it anymore.

"What?!? Excuse you? You're my mother? Since when! A mother wouldn't lie to her child for months about being in a relationship then suddenly drop the bomb on her about her getting married, and expect her to fall over with excitement. It's unrealistic and cruel. Real mothers don't lie. Have you ever looked at it from my point of view, mom? If he's so great, then why did you have to hide him?? Ever thought about that?"

I could feel the heat spreading like wildfire through my veins and my entire body shaking, had she completely lost her mind? Did she really just say that to me? I couldn't believe it! I felt myself getting angrier by the second as her comment replayed over and over again in my mind.

By the way she was now quiet, I could tell I had really struck a nerve. Which also indicated that I was right. By this showed something else, too.

"WHAT ARE YOU HIDING, MOM?? WHAT ELSE HAVEN'T YOU TOLD ME?"

Her eyes got big and her lips formed a tight line, meaning that she was scared and dead nervous.

"SPEAK!"

The fury was just pouring out of my statement, and the acidic nature of my tone meant she needed to answer quickly. I was so sick of playing games with her, my mother was manipulative, deceitful, and vain. For the past sixteen years of my life, she's acted like a roommate. Not a mother. Ms. Emily was my mother.

She got the message.

"We'll be moving to live with him and his son in a few weeks in Boston." She said in a whisper.

I felt my blood boiling. For some sick reason, I was having violent thoughts about tearing the woman that birthed me apart limb from limb.

**"MOVING? TO BOSTON?! I'M NOT GOING ANYWHERE!! I'M NOT LEAVING LA PUSH! YOU CAN GO WHEREVER YOU WANT TO, YOU CAN BURN IN HELL FOR ALL I CARE. BUT I'M NOT MOVING TO BOSTON TO LIVE WITH THAT BASTARD! YOU GUYS CAN PRETEND TO BE A HAPPY FUCKING FAMILY WITHOUT ME! WHEN WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME?? THE DAY BEFORE WE MOVED!! DO YOU KNOW HOW FAR BOSTON IS! I'M NOT MOVING THERE WITH HIM AND HIS…WAIT…"**

That's when the entirety of her statement dawned on me.

**"DID YOU..DID YOU SAY THAT HE HAD A SON?!!?"**

"He's your age."

I screamed out in complete rage as this new fiery feeling took over me and my body shaking violently, scratching and tearing to escape. I tried to fight it, but it felt like my head would explode. Tremors traveled down my spine like waves and it felt like every bone in my body shattered to little pieces glass and fell into my blood stream, traveling through my veins cutting up my whole system. It was the most excruciating pain I'd ever experienced in my life. My emotions were torn between terror and anger, and anger was winning. I grabbed my head as I screamed out again, the pain compelling me to attack that woman.

Her screams only sent me even deeper into the tempest that was now my mind, they reminded me that she was the reason I was in this current predicament. All this mess was her fault. She's a liar.

I took off into the woods beside our house feeling my heart beat the fastest its ever beat before, then the strangest thing happened.

The pain exploded from inside of me, and I felt different in a flash. Everything looked different to me. It was scary. I tried to scream at this foreign experience, but it came out sounding very different. A loud howl quaked the woods around me, hurting my ears and making me cringe.

I walked over to a big puddle left from the rain and looked into it, only to see a big furry scary beast stare back at me. This sent me into a world of panic as I raced to escape that horrible image. Then something made me slow down.

_"Yay! Finally! Now I won't have to avoid her anymore!"_

_"Oh great. Another uninvited guest to join the party."_

_"She must be so scared."_

_"Claire, stop running."_

And my legs stopped running against my will, almost causing me to take a nose dive forward. I tried to continue running, but I couldn't move.

My efforts were even more forced when I heard something loud approaching, but still, no good. My legs were bolted to the ground.

Seconds later I was surrounded by 4 giant wolves, and they looked hungry.

_"Dude, there's no way I would eat you. You don't even look remotely appetizing."_

_"Shut up Maya."_

I recognized immediately that the biggest one, a pure black wolf spoke with the same voice that commanded me to stop running. It sounded familiar.

I realized what had happened now. My mother had succeeded. She finally accomplished driving me completely insane, and now my mind was just reveling in the imaginative illusions it could happily dream up. Because not only did I fear my reflection was a big hairy beast, not only did I hear voices in my head, and not only was I about to be killed by wolves.

But one of the voices I heard earlier belonged to Kim.

And that will never happened.

I fell forward, only to land with my head on my paws, and, wait--paws? I have paws??

I examined my arms and legs and body, to see that I too was a wolf. I had a coat that was brown, not exactly brown like the wolf that stood to the right of the bigger black wolf, but more of a chocolate brown. Mine was prettier.

_"Hey!"_

A voice shouted in my head again, making my head throb even worse.

I accepted that I had gone completely insane and sat, well, laid motionless on the ground waiting for Christmas.

_"You're not insane, silly."_

There it was again. Kim's voice.

I looked up to the wolf that was sandy colored and it wore an open mouth grin, wagging it's tail happily.

_"Kim? Is that you? What am I? What have you guys done to me? I don't want to be a part of your stupid cult!! You already stole my best friend!"_

The anger I had temporarily forgotten was slowing surfacing again.

Oh yeah, I knew who these guys were now. Samantha Uley, and her little crew of followers. The same crew that kidnapped my best friend!

_"Hey we did not kidnap her! She wouldn't go home! Believe me, I've told her to."_

_"Maya, that's enough. No more comments from you."_

Sam said this, and she spoke with that same strong voice that made me stop in my tracks. How does that happen?

_"She's the alpha. Every wolf in the pack has to follow the orders of the Alpha." _she answered my question. _"And sorry about making your head hurt."_

She was really sweet. I presumed her to be Lauren, the nicer one.

_"Claire, you're a werewolf. Just like us. And since you're one of us now, you have to learn the rules. The most important one is that no one can know who we are. No one can know we exist."_ Sam spoke and everyone listened.

_"That's cool. I can keep a secret."_

_"I don't think you understand the ramifications of what I'm saying. Being one of us means that you can no longer be normal, because you aren't. You can't talk to Jordan anymore. You would put her in danger."_

I felt my eyes watering at this statement. I hadn't thought of that. Jordan.

_"What? I can't talk to her? How come? I won't tell her, I promise. But won't just cut off my best friend." _I shot a look at Kim and she instantly looked down, feeling guilty.

_"Claire when we phase, it's usually triggered by anger. Jordan could say one thing to upset you and you could kill her. You can't see her anymore. I'm sorry, but this is the way things have to be."_

_"That's not fair!! I can't do that to her!"_

_"It's the only way, Claire. You have no idea how hard it was for me. I was so alone and scared. I hated myself for what I had become. But when we saw the signs in you, I knew it was simply a matter of waiting. Before long, it would be your time. And now I have you again. You can be mad at me for as long as you want, I'll still be just as happy. If it makes you feel any better, Jordan's real close to joining us too."_

I growled at her, letting her know how furious I was at her. She felt horrible, I could feel what she was feeling, but I felt no pity for her. The way she did us was horrible.

_"I'm sorry I had to do it to the both of you, but I didn't have a choice."_

_"WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DIDN'T HAVE A CHOICE?!!?"_

I roared at Kim, crouching to ready my attack on her.

All of the sudden, the voice spoke again.

_**"CLAIRE, YOU ARE NO LONGER TO SEE JORDAN BLACK. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES CAN YOU SPEAK TO HER."**_

As I tried to fight it, it felt as if cement had been poured into all of my bones putting me in unimaginable pain. I cried out helplessly as I tried to fight the order, only to have my head feel like it was being smashed between two boulders. It was the second most excruciating pain I'd ever felt, next to phasing.

The rest of the wolves left Kim and I alone for some privacy as I cried all my frustration out.

_"So that's what you meant when you said you can't."_ I said through my tears.

_"Now you understand."_


	12. Chapter 11

**DISCLAIMER:** I don't own the fabulous characters or ideas of Twilight, Stephenie Meyer does. And she rocks. Need I saw more?

Shout out to ~//FreakyLittlePixie//~ : Dude, thank you. You're like my favorite person in the world right now. This was my very first fan fiction on here and to have no reviews was heartbreaking, but I never stopped writing because I just knew the day would come!! Awesome, and a million times,

_Thank You._

To The Story!!!!

* * *

**Chapter ELEVEN: WHAT THE HECK IS GOING ON INSIDE MY HEAD**

Claire's POV

I could see his face, his lovely blue eyes stared back at me full of admiration and lust. He licked his perfect full lips as he softly put his hand on my check, I knew very well what he was doing. And I didn't want him to stop. I wanted to kiss him more than anything in the world, I could almost taste it. I could almost feel it. I just couldn't wait to experience the feeling, the sparks, the sharp electric currents that I knew would flow through my body. The butterflies I knew I would feel flapping around like sparrows in my stomach. I wanted to do anything for him, be anything for him, and give him anything in the world he wanted. Anything in the world he desired. I wanted to weight on him hand and foot, making sure he never had to move a muscle. He was just so…beautiful.

I shook my head trying to get the image of the blue-eyed blond guy out of my head, but I couldn't. I could feel all these emotions for him, yet I had no idea who he was. And he was so not attractive to me. Not even in the least. Yet here I was, fantasizing about being his love slave. Why can't I get this jerk outta my head?

_"Sorry."_

Sam thought it, and I realized what it was. She was thinking about him, and since the entire pack shares one mind we shared her emotions and thoughts. Way to go for my first night on "patrol". Like seriously, we were patrolling for vampires. That's it, you heard it right, vampires. They exist. I swear to god if you would've said this like 5 days ago I would've called the looney bin to come and retrieve you, but now I believe it. I mean, because we exist. So why would I believe they wouldn't?

The council and the rest of the pack explained everything to me, and told me that all the legends were true. We were the protectors of La Push. Keeping it safe from "the cold ones", a.k.a. the vampires. They also mention a lot of other brief things like how we don't age, how we're always warm, how we can't go around most of our friends and family anymore (like I didn't already know that), and how we still have to attend school to keep down suspicion. Meaning attending classes like normal sitting in the back of every one, speaking to no one unless spoken to and keeping the conversation minimal (unless their in the pack), under no circumstances can we participate in any sports, and passing classes wasn't all that important but graduating was. Not that I was objecting to the last two, I had been pretty lazy in school in the first place.

So far, being one of the pack didn't seem so bad. I was growing to love my sisters. I really saw nothing wrong with it besides the constant ripping of my wardrobe. Because when you phase, you're completely naked. A bit uncomfortable at first, but none of the girls make it weird (thank god for that). You lose out on sleep a little when it's your night to patrol, but the feeling you get to experience when you do is so freeing. All the space to run, it's just amazing. The hardest thing I'd have to say is that you have to always control your temper, because the smallest things could anger us and trigger a phase. It gets difficult, for some of us more than others (Maya. Seriously, she's a hot head.) Not to mention the fact that there are no secrets in the pack. Everything in your mind is open for the pack to see. Even if you try your hardest, eventually you might slip and let out what you don't want shared. We know all of each other's most embarrassing secrets. So it's kind of fair. But not really. The bonds in the pack are strong, and there is nothing that can break them. We're a family, and nothing can come between us.

But something was still bugging me. Why did Sam feel so strongly for this guy? She just met him a few days ago.

_"I apologize, Claire. I'm trying very hard not to think about Eric. It's just…hard."_

We were patrolling, and she was on the other side of the La Push border. It was only us and Maya tonight, but Maya was rather silent. She had patrol duty yesterday, so she must be pretty used to it.

_"Why do you think about him so much? It's as if you love him."_

_"I do."_

_"But how? You've only known the guy for like, three days."_

_"Claire, do you remember all the legends?"_

_"Of course."_

_"Do you remember the one about Imprinting?"_

_"Yeah, I think I--wait. You can't be serious. You imprinted? That stuff is real? It's like, love at first sight right?"_

_"We're real, aren't we? And it's not like love at first sight. Love at first sight is an experience described by humans, right? Well, we're not human. So for us, it's something that is so much more. It's much more stronger, and it means so much more. When we imprint, we find our perfect match. The one made solely for us. For eternity. This person is…soul mate doesn't even describe it. It's deeper than that."_

_"What do you mean? And how did it happen? How does it feel?"_

All of the sudden Claire was rushed with all the events of the day Sam found Eric on the beach. All the emotions, all the reactions, all the images. The pure joy of it all. And the servitude and gratitude of imprinting. It was strong and mind-blowing.

_"Now you understand. I could never imagine being without him. My entire world is centered around him. My existence is meaningful only because he values it. And if the case were any different, I would be anything he needed in me. A sister, a best friend, or his lover. Whatever he needed at the time. Because I was made just for him. And he was made just for me."_

Claire thought about everything she had learned for the rest of the thought. One thought she didn't mean to let slip did.

_"Yes, you have an imprint too. You just haven't found him yet. Your love will come. He's out there. Just be patient. You'll meet him when you least expect it, and it's true that it will hit you exactly like a ton of bricks. Don't spend all your time worrying about it, it's not like we don't have all eternity."_

I laughed. She was right. I guess…I just had to be patient.

* * *

**COMMENTS PLEASE! AGAIN, THANK YOU TO ~//FreakyLittlePixie//~ **


	13. Chapter 12

**Chapter TWELVE: DANGEROUSLY IN LOVE**

"Just come now."

"Are you sure? It's still kind of early--"

"I'm sure. Everybody in my house is asleep. Come on, I miss you and it's your birthday. I have to see you. I wouldn't be able to live with myself."

"Alright, I love you."

"I love you too. See you in a minute."

I hung up the phone all smiles, today was 16th birthday. I haven't seen Jake all day, and since Claire and Kim won't talk to me anymore he's all I have left. I just couldn't believe Claire became a zombie like Kim did, after she promised she wouldn't. You have no idea how painful dealing with it was. I just recently stopped crying over my two lost best friends/sisters. But Jake has helped me through it, I love him with all my heart. And nothing or no one will come between us.

I took off into the dark of the night through the woods to Jacob's house, and when I got to his house I picked up a few pebbles and threw them at his window.

The last one was a little huge and made a very loud noise that I heard echo through his house. He came to his window and smiled at me, then seconds later he came out his back door to embrace me.

"Happy birthday Jordan."

I swear to God, it sounded so sweet last year when he said it, but this year it meant so much more. The words sounded more meaningful. I loved Jacob with all of my heart. We would be together forever.

"I have your present."

He must've saw my eyes get big in the darkness, because he covered my mouth to silence my scream.

Then he took my wrist with the bracelet with wolf charm on it (which I NEVER take off), and tinkered with it for a bit. After a while he let it go, and I saw something sparkly dangling from it in the darkness. I touched it and it felt hard, and heart shaped.

"Now you have my heart. It's crystal, so don't break it."

He couldn't get any more words out before I pulled him into a deep passionate kiss that only ended so we could catch our breath. Our heart rates were beating rapidly, and I could the butterflies in my stomach again. Jacob always did that to me. He made me feel so many emotions at once, I just knew he was the one for me.

And I was sort of hoping that tonight would, you know…

_**Be the night.**_

This time he pulled me into a softer, sweeter kissed that made my knees buckle under me. Luckily the conveniently placed hand he had on the small of my back caught me before I fell and hit the ground. But truthfully, I had already fallen for Jake and he caught me a long time ago.

Our romantic moment of pure true love and bliss was rudely interrupted.

"JAKE!! JACOB CLEARWATER, YOU GET YOUR BUTT IN THE THIS HOUSE RIGHT NOW!!"

Harry Clearwater was fuming at his son as he stood on his back porch. His face would've been a plum-violet color, had the area been well-lit.

"No dad, you can't stop us from seeing each other. I love Jordan. And she loves me. This is crazy. I'm sick of it."

"I TOLD YOU TO NEVER SPEAK TO MY SON AGAIN!! I TOLD YOU TO STAY AWAY!! GET AWAY FROM MY SON!!"

"DON'T TALK TO HER LIKE THAT!!"

Jacob was red in the face as well, and he was shaking. This was something I'd never saw Jacob do, I'd never seen him get this mad. He never got that upset. He slowly balled his face, standing up and defying his father…over me.

"GET AWAY FROM MY SON, AND STAY FAR AWAY. DO YOU HEAR ME?!!? THIS IS THE LAST STRAW!"

He was right. It was. For me too.

**"Why? WHY?!?! WHY CAN'T WE BE TOGETHER?!!? WHY CAN'T EVERYONE JUST LET US BE?!! ALL WE WANT TO DO IS BE WITH EACH OTHER!! WE LOVE EACH OTHER!! HOW COME THAT'S NOT ENOUGH!! WHY IS EVERYBODY AGAINST US?!? WHY SHOULD WE HAVE TO HIDE OUR LOVE, HAVING A SECRET RELATIONSHIP? MY LOVE FOR JACOB IS NOT SOMETHING I'M ASHAMED OF, AND I REFUSE TO HIDE IT ANYMORE. I WONT."**

My body was fueling off of my words, sending the engine that is my heart into a speeding raging fury. I felt so angry, my mind was boiling. I was really hot, I could barely breathe, and I felt my entire body shaking. I couldn't control it. I felt like ripping Harry Clearwater's head off and anyone else who dared to stand in between me and Jacob.

**"LEAVE AND NEVER COME BACK."**

He spit the words at me as if I was some disgusting dog, some sort of parasite.

The shudders and tremors traveling through my body at an increasingly and violently dangerous rate, and I felt as if my head would explode. I screamed out at Harry Clearwater with ferocity and anger as my body turned inside out.

I was about to dash for him, when I saw him scream out and cower in fear.

He was screaming something at me, but I couldn't hear it. I tried to yell at him some more, but it sounded like a dog growling. It was very menacing and vicious, and it frightened me because I wasn't fully aware of where it came from. It was a feeling that originated from deep within my chest.

I was about to attack him when I heard something.

"STOP!"

I turned around, hearing fear in Jacob's voice. His eyes were wide with terror, and he was pale with fear. He was shaking.

This froze me for a moment, he was scared of me? Did he think I would hurt him? Why would he think that? Why would he ever think that? I could never, _ever_ do anything to harm him. I love him too much.

For this brief second I was distracted, I felt something big and hard slam into my side from the woods and dig it's teeth into me. When I got back on my feet, I was face to face with a big black wolf, bigger than natural, bigger than usual, and it was baring its teeth at me. It was ready to attack.

My initial reaction got the best of me, and I attacked it back, and we tumbled into the woods away from the Clearwater house.

We began to fit, snapping and biting and clawing furiously at each other, till the black wolf had me pinned. It was only a little bigger than I was, and I had wounded it as badly as it had wounded me. How had I become a wolf? A hideous beast? A monster? An awful spirit, seconds away from attacking the love of my life?

**_"You will be calm. And listen."_**

For some reason, after a strange voice in my head stated this I couldn't attack the black wolf anymore. And I really wanted to. I wanted a rematch. A fair fight. I was caught off guard the first time, but this time I was on my guard.

_"Jordan, you need to calm down. Control your anger. You almost killed Jacob."_

That got me to focus. When I started to calm down, I could hear a lot more voices in my head. They all sounded strangely familiar. I had no idea what was going on, but I would not let my guard down.

_"Jordan! Finally!"_

_"About time you joined the party!"_

_"You really need to learn to control your temper, Jordan"_

_"Oh great. Now the trio's back together again."_

Kim? Kim and Claire? Did I hear their voices? It couldn't be pos--

_"Yep, it's us. And we've missed you, Jor."_

I began to freak.

_"Wha…what's going on? What happened to me? What am I?"_

And that's when they explained everything to me, explaining what we are and what the hard sacrifices were in our lives that we had to make. Tears clouded my vision as I thought about Jake. And all they could say was I'm sorry.

It was then that I took off, running as fast and as far as my legs could take me, never looking back.

I could still hear their thoughts telling me to stop, but I didn't care.

I never stopped running.

* * *

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	14. Chapter 13

**Chapter Thirteen: face the music. Face the pain.**

I ran as far as I could, as fast as I could, allowing my legs to carry me for two straight weeks. Stopping occasionally for baths in rivers, and the most recent accomplishment/development:

Hunting.

My first kill was a large black-tail dear, a buck to be exact. And the thrill of it was amazing. And what's even better, to my surprise, the taste wasn't that bad. It was actually considerably tolerable. Once I got past the thought of it (which took all of 5 seconds), I let my wolf instincts take over. I could compare it to being numb. Living instinctively like an animal, like my wolf counterpart, my better half of myself, this was my choice for what seemed like forever.

I had decided I could never return to La Push, for I would never forgive myself for the danger I put the only one I ever loved in. The irresponsible harm he was almost subjected to was completely my fault, and it was something that had been haunting me this entire time. My thoughts were centered around that night's events, replaying as vividly in my mind as the time they actually happened. This wasn't so bad though, at least I didn't have to see the pain on the faces of those I hurt in person, I only saw them in the pack's thoughts. They were still begging me to come back, to come home, and they were making it seem like it was something they were leaving out. But surprisingly, none of them let it slip. I would say it was an Alpha order, but I never heard Sam deliver one to them since the incident.

Yes I was explained everything against my will, no matter how much I tried to avoid it they eventually told me everything. The only way I truly could escape it was phasing back to my human form, a trick that took me no time at all to master, but being human wasn't as comfortable. I was happy in my fur. Sam hadn't made me come home yet, but I knew she was getting close to giving the order. She was giving me time and space to deal with this, hoping I would decide to return on my own. Little good that would do. My mind was made up. Still, I had to be grateful at how understanding she was being. At how understanding the pack was being. Although it was a debatable argument in the beginning, it was easily decided my first time phasing was the most painful emotionally. This fact was now irrefutable. No one had suffered the way I had, none of them had to suffer or live with the guilt that I did. None of them had almost attacked their loved ones. So none of them could do anything when I also made the definite decision to become a mental mute in the pack, I really hadn't thought a word since the fight. Since that night. I refused to talk to them. I refused to talk, period.

None of them had to make a sacrifice like I would have. Not Sam, not perfect Alpha Sam. The others were right, her thoughts were getting slightly annoying. All she would think is that she could never do what I did to Eric. A blunt and agonizing reminder of the current predicament I was in every time the thought crossed her mind. She would quickly apologize and try to refrain from doing it, but still. Having imprinted didn't leave much room in her mind for other thoughts. It was sickening, how in love she was. A love like the love I used to share with someone so special, it was something so real, until I destroyed it. I was a monster. The very worse of the pack. I didn't deserve to even take breath after what I did. I mean, look at what I did. Look at the rest of the pack. Even though Claire was livid when she first phased, she realized after she calmed down that she could never literally harm her mother. Though sometimes she downright deserved it. And Kim just felt guilt for the way she acted toward Aunt Emily. A guilt that was painful, but still nowhere close to mine.

And the only remedy I had come up with to this pain was running. Rhythmic running. One, two-three, four, one, two-three, four—dum dum-dum dum—dull paw thuds against the damp earth, over and over again. I noticed 3 days ago I was past the Canadian border, but something made me push harder. I realized in the thoughts of three others--Maya, Claire, and Kim--trees rushing past them at full speed in their vision. Familiar looking trees. They were running after me. To stop me. To slow me down. I broke out into full sprint when I realized this, pushing the hardest I've ever pushed. They could never catch me. I was easily the fastest and second biggest wolf in the pack, next to Sam. None of the others came close to me. Sam wasn't even as fast as I was. The distance between us grew wider and wider as my feet treaded the ground. But there was one thought I couldn't help but let cross my mind.

Why was Maya with them?

"_Because I'm getting sick of everybody missing you. Frantically searching for you, worried about you. No matter where I go, I can't escape it. This is stupid, and downright dumb Jordan. You need to come home. And end this." _

I shook my head as I ran, trying to ignore her comments.

"_Really Jor, you need to come home. Billy needs you. You're all he's got left, and you know that. You don't know how much he's hurting."_

A sad picture of Billy's long, worried and aged face flashed in Kim's mind, making me slow just so slightly. But it wasn't enough to change my mind. I had blatantly disobeyed my father. Remembering this and the fury I was sure to face for my actions, Kim quickly realized this was not the best motivator to get me to come home.

"_Jordan, you need to come home. We miss you.** He** misses you."_

The image that bombarded my mind made me skid horribly in my tracks, digging my paws into the ground. Jacob's pale, worried, sad, frantic, panic-ridden, paranoid, lost, hurt, heartbrokenly beautiful face stared at me in my head, his eyes pleading with tears tugging at him. He looked a mess, like he hadn't slept in ages. The bags in his eyes were so deep, it was unreal. His face was an ever permanent grimace, looking as if happiness never existed there once upon a time. This was a face that I was clearly unfamiliar with, this wasn't the Jacob I had known and loved. This face belonged to a boy who was completely hurt, past emotions. He looked like he was feeling pain physically; internally.

This brought tears to my eyes, he was this way because of me. All this was my fault. Everything was my fault. I was to blame. I was the blame for everything. The world could end tomorrow, and I would take responsibility. Because I didn't deserve a happy ending, I didn't deserve happiness. I didn't deserve anything for putting such a beautiful person through such pain. I really was a monster.

_"He's been looking for you like crazy, putting up posters and everything. He's worrying himself sick. He misses you so much. It's painful for everybody to watch. You can't put him through this anymore, Jor."_

I felt my lips tighten on my teeth and a vicious snarl erupted from my chest as I wheeled around, ready to face them when I arrived.

**"_WHY SHOULD I?!?! WON'T I JUST DO THE SAME THING TO HIM WHEN I GET BACK!??! WON'T I JUST HAVE TO IGNORE HIM, ACT LIKE HE DOESN'T EXISTS?!! TREAT HIM LIKE DIRT!! LIKE YOU ALL DID ME!? JACOB DOESN'T DESERVE THAT. HE DOESN'T DESERVE THAT, ESPECIALLY NOT FROM ME. I WON'T DO IT. I'D RATHER HE THOUGTHT I DIED THAN TO PUT HIM THROUGH THAT."_**

By now they had arrived and Maya bared her teeth at me, her ears folded to her head. She was ready for a fight. Well so was I. I hadn't had a fight in about two weeks.

_"Jordan, you need to come to your senses and see reason. Jacob needs you right now, more than ever." Sam's voice rang through my head, to be followed with the most disturbing news I'd ever received in my life._

There, laid out in front of my face, were images of Harry Clearwater's body, unconscious and pale, laying lifelessly in an hospital bed with tubes and monitors hooked up to him from every direction. All of the sudden different angles of this same picture hit me, different perspectives I realized. They were all letting me see their thoughts. I know they were doing this trying to help, but they didn't realize how much more painful this made it for me. It was like multiple stabs.

**Heart Attack.**

Slowly the images got worse as his health steadily decreased, making me shrink smaller and smaller into myself. The final picture was the hardest. Their laid Harry Clearwater, dead at age 45, with Sue, Jacob, and Sarah crying helplessly by his hospital bed. I broke down, falling to the ground. It truly was all my fault. It was all because of me. Harry Clearwater suffered a heart attack and eventually lost his life protecting his son from a werewolf. From a monster. From me.

I died internally, feeling my entire system go completely numb. So this is what they'd been hiding from me.

Well I didn't have to worry about ignoring Jacob now. He'd surely hate me for what I'd do to him. To his family. To his life.

After a few minutes of sobbing and whimpering and howling, I slowly lifted my heavy body from the ground and dragged myself towards the direction of La Push. Grudgingly forcing myself, preparing to face the music of my own mess. Taking the punishment I rightfully deserved. It was now that I realized I couldn't run away from my problems, I had to face them head on. And these were my problems.

Sam didn't have to lay the order for me to return home. It was something I had to do, so I decided on my own. Jacob would probably want to kill me, or at the very least give me a piece of his mind.

And I at least owed him that much. I owed everybody that much.


	15. Chapter 14

**Chapter Fourteen: Heartbreak Under The Edict**

We traveled back to La Push silently. No one's thoughts interrupted my own. What would I say? What could I say to Jacob? Sorry was nowhere near enough. He would probably yell at me nonstop, his tears would seem like they would never end. And I would do nothing to stop him. Do nothing but tell him I love him. Because in the end, that's the most important thing. I would never stop loving Jacob. Nothing or no one could make me feel different. Ever. Even if I did have to pretend he didn't exist after this, he could be at peace knowing that much.

"_No."_

Sam's voice stopped me, and I looked around for her. We all stopped when we saw she stopped and stood with her head held high a few feet behind us.

"_No what?" _I knew she had to be talking to me.

"_No, you will not tell him that Jordan."_

I turned around and approached her now. _"What do you mean I won't tell him that?"_

"_That will just make this harder on the both of you. That is not the best way. You cannot tell him that."_

I was angry now. _"What?!? What do you mean I can't tell him I love him? He needs to know that, Sam. I __**need**__ him to know that. You cannot take that away from me."_

I heard a growl erupt from my chest, and I knew I was about to fight Sam. She was crossing the line now.

"_This is not debatable. You, Jordan, will not tell Jacob you love him when you see him for the last time. You will not speak. You will sit there, and let him get his anger out. You can only speak five words to him, '__**We can never speak again.'**__. This will be the only time you can speak. __**You will not harm Jacob Clearwater, Jordan Black.**__" _Sam's alpha commands were painful, I felt as if someone was squeezing my brain as hard as they could.

No speaking? Except for one measly sentence? How cruel. How truly heartless.

"_I'm sorry Jordan, but trust me. This is the best way. The pain will go away with time."_

I let out the most angry howl ever heard. This wasn't happening. This was _not _happening. Why me? Why Jacob? Why us? Why did I have to be born different? Maybe Sam was right. Because after this, he would surely hate me. There was no doubt. Maybe that was the best way. It's a million times easier to get over someone you hate rather than someone you love. It's worlds easier. Maybe this was the best way.

And that was what I kept repeating to myself, I phased back and headed for the Clearwaters' house. The rest of the pack didn't even follow me to supervise, there was no way I could break an Alpha command. Just thinking of it stung.

I knocked 3 times, and Jacob answered the door with an expression as if he'd seen a ghost. He was much worse than in their thoughts, just seeing him this way killed me inside.

"Jordan…" He didn't speak above a whisper, I don't think he was capable of it yet.

I heard his heartbeat speed up, and I knew he was questioning whether he was dreaming or going crazy. I was questioning the same things.

He reached and touched my face, but didn't flinch when he felt how warm it was. I knew it burned his hand, he could tell something was different. But he still had his eyes in a concentrated squint, still not believing what he was seeing. When I rested my face in the palm of his hand enjoying his touch--his soft, loving touch--he let out a slight sigh. A small smile showed on his face.

He then pulled me into a big hug, a hug that was so tight it would've been painful. He held me as if he felt like this was the last time he'd see me again.

"Jordan, I was so worried…I didn't know what to think. I didn't know what happened. Where were you? Are you okay? Where have you been? What's going on, Jor…"

I cringed inside when I heard him use his nickname for me, that felt like more of a stab than a sting.

He pulled away from the hug, still frantic, and held both of my hands in his. He looked deep into my eyes through his tears, and this was the most painful part emotionally. I wanted to look away so badly, but I couldn't.

"_This is for the best." _My thoughts reminded me, but it sure didn't feel like it. It felt like death.

"Look babe, I just want you to know. I don't blame you for what happened…I don't believe it was your fault. I'm not mad at you. Well, at least not for that. I am mad that you were missing for two weeks. What the hell were you thinking Jordan? No phone call? No note? Not a single person knew where you were."

That's not true. 5 people knew where I was. Presumably more if you added the counsel. The counsel that now included his mom who assumed her husband's spot after his untimely death, so who was really at fault here? His own mother was lying to him. I wasn't alone. Suddenly the pack didn't feel like sisters to me, they felt like betrayers. The world did. Faith did. Fate did. Love did. Because if love was so grand, it wouldn't punish two people as caring as me and Jacob. We didn't deserve this. The wolf pack weren't protectors, they were punishers. And Sam was the warden, the tyrant. And I was nothing but a mere slave, forced to do things against my will. Forced to sever all ties with those I cared about, as if what I am, what I was born, was my fault. It dawned on me that this was not to end soon, either. This was for all eternity. For all eternity I would have to watch Jacob, heartbroken as I, suffer. This was not gracious, this was cruel. Because in the end, two souls would be lost. Not just one. Not just mine. Jacob was to pay for Sam's decision, too.

"**Do you know how stupid that was Jordan?!? I know you were mad, but that was just dumb! And dangerous! You could've been hurt! Do you not care about us? About me? Because you can never imagine what I've been through. Do you know how scared I was? How freaked out I've been for the last two weeks, huh Jordan? I've been terrified! I thought you were hurt somewhere, **_**or worse…"**_

He trailed off as if he couldn't finish his sentence. Little did he know, his "worse" scenario was one I would welcome with open arms right about now.

He got serious as he peered into my eyes. "Don't you ever scare me like that again, Jordan. Ever. I can't live without you. I need you, that's all there is to it. I love you Jordan, with all my heart. And I always will. Don't you still love me?"

This triggered it. My bottom lip began to tremble as the tears flowed from my eyes, my entire cool, calm exterior fell to shambles. I couldn't hold it in anymore. I had to tell him. I needed to tell him. I have to tell him I love him. And I will never stop. I shook as I battled with the Alpha command that was reigning inside me, it felt as if the edict was crushing me. I felt weightless and powerless against it, though I still had my will to fight it. I could feel the drive, the need, to just sit there and listen as Jacob scolded me. The compulsion grew, and I felt useless. But I still felt like I had something worth fighting it for.

Jacob's tone fell, like he was hurt. He was reaching conclusions about my silence. "What? What, you don't love me anymore? Huh Jordan? Is that it? Look, whatever I did, I can fix it. Whatever happened, we can work through it. Together."

I whimpered in pain now, the squeezing feeling on my brain was getting stronger as the sentence I wished to say screamed louder in my thoughts. _**'I LOVE YOU TOO, JACOB.'**_

I screamed at my brain to move my lips and make my voice work, but it felt like puppet strings hooked into all of my muscles. I shook even harder, fighting the pull of the strings.

"Look Jordan, whatever you're upset about, we can work it out. I'm sorry for making you mad all those times, and all those stupid arguments. They were my fault. Just, please…I need to hear your voice. I've gone so long without it Jor, I need to hear it. Just say something."

I fell to my knees now, I bit my tongue to keep from crying out in pain. Less than a second later, I tasted blood. About three seconds later it was gone, but I could still feel the pain. Then I realized the pain was not from the wound at all. The puppet strings no longer felt like strings at all, they felt like steel cables. Forcing me against my will. **How could this have been the right choice? The right decision? **

Jacob fell to his knees beside me, with the tears clouding his vision completely. He rested his hand on my cheek and spoke in a heartbreaking, whispering voice.

"Jordan…" His voice cracked when he said my name. That one didn't feel like a stab, it felt like a bullet straight to the heart.

"Jordan please…I love you. I thought you loved me. Is this what you want? You're going to ignore me? Just like Claire and Kim ignored you? After all the fighting we went through to be together…you're going to end it like this. Don't…don't do this Jordan. Please. Don't ignore me. Don't shut me out like all the others."

He hesitated for a second, then placed a soft gentle kiss on my lips. This was when I fought the hardest, but again, it did no use. I felt as if a rope was tied around me, and it pulled me back. Pulled me away from his lips. It was the most agonizing motion yet. The compulsion, the edict, the puppet strings, the steel cables, all of the forces of the Alpha command pulled together to finish one final portion of the order. It was then I felt my voice box freed, freed from all forces and dictations.

I tried to use this quick advantage, but the sentence I wanted to speak did not come out. The only sentence that would've saved the situation, saved both of our lives, hearts, and souls, was not spoken. The one that would ruin them, ruin _US_ forever, was spoken instead.

"**WE CAN NEVER SPEAK AGAIN."**

He sat there. Stunned, heartbroken, hurt, betrayed. All of the above. All of the thinkable, and some of the unthinkable. I couldn't bare it. I couldn't bare this anymore. I took off as fast as I could into the nearest woods, and phased.

The howl that came from my soul that night was unforgettable. It was the saddest, most heart sore, most pained howl to ever fall on ears.


	16. Chapter 15

Chapter Fifteen: Broken

The pain I felt from that moment on out was excruciating. When I wasn't feeling intense pain, I felt nothing at all. Completely numb, void of all feeling and emotion. I still haven't decided which one I prefer more. When I'm numb I don't feel or see anything, including Jacob. Including the world. Including life, really. I don't meet anyone's eyes, I rarely speak, and I never move. Unless I'm ordered to. I think I just…exist. What a sad existence it is. I go to school, I speak close to none, I patrol the border, I barely eat…for what? What's the point? Is there a point anymore? Things that used to feel necessary for me, thinks that were programmed in me, reflexive actions feel trivial to me now. Breathing feels like a chore, a force, and no longer an action I didn't have to think about doing. Breathing feels like work, work for no pay, but I've already tried stopping. I can't die. It's not possible. I truly hate being immortal. I truly hate being here. I have nothing to live for. The rest of the pack sees this as a gift, but I see it for what it really is; a curse. A sentence to eternal damnation. But on earth. Being part of the pack is more torture than you can imagine.

They're so happy, so joyous about their lives. Finding their imprints, or just accepting what they are. None of them feel like prisoners, none of them feel like I do. I feel…broken.

I'd never let it slip in my thoughts that I was thinking about death, I didn't want to hear any of theirs. I figured out a way to die, to be free and rid of this world, but it wouldn't be easy. And it required patience. There is only one thing that could kill a werewolf, and we hadn't come across any since any of us first phased. Vampires.

Yes, a bite from a vampire could kill a werewolf…our fast healing abilities were no match for that. But only finding a vampire…and allowing one to bite me before the pack could destroy it…that was the hard part. Patrolling since God knows when, and we still haven't came across one foreign scent. I know that this should be a good thing, meaning our lands were safe, but the pain wouldn't let me care in that way. This fact only angered me, I didn't care about protecting anymore. How could I, when I didn't even care about breathing? About my own life?

So now it was the matter of waiting, and of hiding these thoughts from the rest of the pack. It would be hard, but it's not like I had anything better to do with my thoughts.

My only hope was that someday, somehow Jacob could forgive me…and maybe we could be together on the other side. This thought alone was the only thing that kept my pessimistic mind slightly optimistic. I had some sort of reprieve to look forward too. If, that is, Jacob didn't completely hate me with his whole heart.

The heart, a fragile muscle, but an even more fragile emotional piece to our being, can be easily broken. And shrinks with every remainder of the one thing it lacks, the only thing it beats for; love. And my heart was reminded in the worst way, everyday. Another member of the pack had imprinted, and it stung more than Sam's thoughts or Alpha commands. Feeling her joy and happiness hurt more than words could express, and I had so much evil and resentment in my heart that I couldn't even be happy for her.

* * *

"No, Jonah, no. Don't put that in your mouth, that's not food." The little baby whined for a second, then got distracted with the beautiful tennis bracelet on her wrist.

I watched Kim play with the infant, she looked so happy and complete. A smile that I had not seen since before her father died, when we were all 8. It was something she was missing, and she finally found it.

She looked up at me and smiled, all of her emotions were found in her eyes. I faked a smile back at her, and it must've worked.

We all sat around her living room, Aunt Emily was in the kitchen making dinner. Maya, Lauren, and Claire were watching America's Next Top Model while Sam helped Aunt Emily. We hung out here a lot now. Kim sat on the couch with the baby in her lap, and I sat in the chair next to her.

"I still can't believe it…it's so amazing."

I nodded at her, and she continued to tell her story.

"I just…I don't know how it happened. I was at first beach sitting near the waves…just thinking about everything. Thinking about you, really. How sad you've been. I was looking down at my toes in the sand, then I heard a sound. I looked up to see a beautiful, blue-eyed baby boy waddling over to me. I wondered why, then looked next to me and saw a pretty green shell next to me in the sand. That must've been what he wanted. I picked the baby up and started playing with him, he was the cutest thing I'd ever seen."

We heard laughter erupt from kitchen, and Kim's eyes gleamed at one particular laugh.

"Then his father walks up and apologizes, he says that he likes to wander off a lot…and I looked up into his eyes. It was like…like magic. That's the only way I can explain it. It was like…everything in the world that mattered to me disappeared…and all that mattered was him. His son, Jonah, started laughing and clapping in my arms, but it still didn't break our gaze and moment. We never stopped staring into each other's eyes. I used to always think, if it ever happened to me, it would scare me half to death. But now that I've imprinted, I know that…it's nothing to be afraid of. It's too wonderful to be afraid of. I knew exactly how Sam felt about Eric. Jared is the only thing that matters to me. Jared, and my baby Jonah."

The way she said Jared's name made me sick, you could just feel the stars, unicorns, and rainbows she was seeing when she said it.

She kissed Jonah's head and he smiled, sleeping angelically in her arms. She looked like the perfect mother and I knew she would be, Jonah would be very lucky. Jared walked back into the room from the kitchen and kissed Kim's forehead, making her turn a shade of pink. He softly kissed her lips and touched her cheek, never leaving her eyes. His smile was so genuine, I could see the adoration he held for her in his eyes. She just loved him like nothing else in the world. He kissed Jonah's head, and they seemed to be one happy family.

Lovely. Now you see my pain. My own cousin, my used-to-be-best-friend….has went off to the dark side.

She has succumbed to love.


	17. Chapter 16

**DISCLAIMER:** I don't own the fabulous characters or ideas of Twilight, Stephenie Meyer does. And she rocks. Need I saw more?

Sorry for the long, long, looooooong wait. Just had a lot going on. I hope you like this chapter. I know you'll like the next one, trust me.

**Chapter Sixteen: Hope.**

I lived in this void for three months, it had been three months exactly since I first phased. Since I turned 16. And 7 weeks, 3 days, 14 hours, 10 minutes, and 33 seconds since I broke Jacob's heart. Counting was unavoidable, I had nothing better to do with my time or thoughts. Other than long to be with him, to be next to him, to hold him close and tell him how much I love him, or otherwise long for death. Both of them would be my heaven from this hell. It felt like everyone around me was so damn happy, yet I felt a pool, no, a _grave_ of gloom and despair engulfing me 24-7. I didn't even long for what they had, I wanted my own. I wanted my Jacob.

It was torture, pain worst than anything you know to see him everyday. Riding the bus with him, watching him sit towards the middle with his friends while I sat in the very back with the pack watching over everything, sitting in the back of the classroom while he sits next to me making clear effort to ignore him, sitting at lunch with the pack or otherwise alone staring blankly out the window wishing to be anywhere else in the world because of the burning glare of hatred you felt searing the back of your head. But the glare of hatred was constant. That lasted all day. It wasn't just exclusively for lunchtime. It was every time we were in each other's presence. And to have to take it, to have to sit there and take it and say nothing, to just accept the fact that things will never be better, never be the same, is a punishment worse than hell itself. Trying to hide my tears is the biggest trial I deal with during these times. If this was just the end of junior year, senior year would be Armageddon. My world would end, come crashing down, and I would be rendered helpless to stop it, no forced to watch it all crash and burn. I don't know if I could take that much longer of this. My only hope was my plan.

Well at least everybody got a taste of how I feel everyday.

It was raining really hard again today, and everyone in La Push was filled with sorrow and sadness. And fear. You could smell the fear, you could feel it. The reservation was dripping with fear. Everyone went into this quiet, somber, depression and nobody spoke much. Those of us who had loved ones kept them closer and held them even tighter, for fear they could lose them if they left our sight. It was a scary thing, almost unimaginable. It was a difficult thing to accept. The news was too horrible.

At least everyone got a glimpse of how I've been feeling, though not completely. They felt the empty and sadness I lived in, even if the causes weren't the same. Truthfully, in my eyes they were, but to everyone else they weren't even close.

There was another attack in the woods surrounding La Push, this time a woman from our reservation was found dead. It was a tragedy. Everyone was distraught. To the people of La Push, something dangerous was lurking out there, and it was most definitely a carnivore. But the pack knew better. Sam, Kim, and Claire had been on patrol around 2:00 in the morning when they caught the scent, and ran to intercept the vampire's path. Along the way, Sam let out a howl that was so fierce and alarming, it stopped what every werewolf was doing and we all ran to join the fight. We all arrived, and couldn't believe our eyes.

A vampire, a woman, looking to be in her mid-twenties, fiery red hair and pale skin. Her eyes were a bright crimson, we saw the helplessly drained La Push woman laying dead at her feet. When we arrived, she gave us the creepiest half-smile ever seen, then took off. We chased her, but she crossed our border into territory that wasn't ours. And we would _not_ violate the treaty.

So to everyone else on the reservation, this was a great lost to some horridly vicious animal on the loose. But to the pack, this meant an opponent. This meant red alert. This meant a threat to what we were protecting, danger.

And to me…to ME…this meant opportunity. This meant relief. This meant hope. This meant the power of prayer works. This means want something long enough, and you'll get it.

But how? How could I get what I want? One little bite. That's all I needed. That's all it would take. To them she seemed like a demon, a deliverer of death, but to me she seemed like…the death angel. The deliverer of something great.

This was what made me different. I felt totally opposite from everyone on the reservation after that night. They all felt sadness and fear, but for the first time in a long time…I felt hope. I had faith.

As a consequence, Sam doubled the patrolling shifts for everybody. We would stay on red alert until we killed the bloodsucker. Everyone was exhausted, but me…I was excited. I could only dream I would be the one to find the bloodsucker yet again, and she would give me what I wanted. Hiding this excitement was no problem, but it's presence was sometimes overwhelming. I actually smiled once while I was by myself, the thought alone did the trick. They were ready for the fight of their lives, while I was ready for mine to end. I was betting to lose the fight. It's not like they would miss me. That much, anyways. Kim might. I mean, I haven't been anything but a burden in everyone's head. My depressing thoughts must've been getting on their nerves. So what. It serves them right.

I think my father sort of knew what was going on to me, and the thoughts I was thinking, but he didn't reveal it. Sometimes I even wonder if he would even try to stop me.

Well, turns out I received the wish I hoped for. My opportunity came. It just didn't happen the way I planned.


	18. Chapter 17

DISCLAIMER:** I don't own the fabulous characters or ideas of Twilight, Stephenie Meyer does. And she rocks. Need I saw more?**

**

* * *

Chapter Seventeen: Hearing Voices.**

It was around four in the morning when I was running patrol with Lauren and Maya, both of who were annoyingly excited and itching for a fight. I ran and ran, feeling free from everything that worried me otherwise when I was standing still. I gained more and more speed, faster and faster, hoping to be the first one to catch the scent of the leech. The trees grew more indistinguishable the faster I sprinted, a great green blur was all I could make of the forest around me.

And then…I smelled it. It was leech for sure, but not the same leech from before. A new one, definitely. It was really faint, almost nonexistent. I only caught a hint of it, before my attention was grabbed otherwise. It didn't even register enough with me for Lauren and Maya to see it in my thoughts, what happened next took more effort and brain power, and distracted me.

Howls, loud painful howls, new howls, unknown howls could be heard in the distance towards La Push. Screaming and panting rang like sirens and alarms in our thoughts, it was so loud I thought my ears would bleed. The voices sounded slightly familiar, but my head was swimming too hard to even think about that and try to recognize them.. I let out a blood-boiling howl, hopefully alerting Sam was something wrong.

In the next instant, we took off back towards La Push as fast as we could. Me being in the lead because I was the fastest, I arrived seconds before the rest of the pack. I could NOT believe my eyes.

Two wolves, two new wolves, two UNKNOWN wolves stood before me, looking scared for their lives. One definitely more defined and broader than the other. The larger one was bigger in size, it was way taller and had bigger paws. It was the about the same size as me and Sam. The smaller one, on the other hand, looked slimmer and leaner. It looked swifter, though it was way more fragile. It was way more scared than the larger one, too. The larger one was grey with black spots along the hunches of its back, it's tall shoulders were only a few centimeters lower to the ground than mine. Its muzzle was bigger. I realized the larger one was protecting them both, it was crouching defensively.

"_**LEAVE US ALONE."**_

The voice echoed through my being as if I was completely hallow, I felt completely frozen in place. Frozen in time. The threat and command in the voice reminded me so much of an Alpha command, it was unreal. The wolf before me stood scowling with anger in its eyes, making me feel like the stranger and threat I truly was. It bared its teeth at me, growling angrily, ready to pounce at the faintest movement.

Tears sprang from my eyes, flowing into flooding rivers off my face. Yet even now, I still could say nothing. The steel cables were constricting worse than ever before.

"_Stay back." _the smaller wolf spoke in a timid, less confident voice. I figured I could speak to them.

"_Sarah…" _my voice was shaken and hoarse, you could hear the tears in it.

"_Jordan?" _I could hear every emotion in his voice. Confusion, hurt, shock, pain.

Jacob stared at me as I stared blankly at him, still unable to say anything.

By now the others showed up, completely caught up with what was going on because of my thoughts.

"_Jacob and Sarah? Really?" _Kim asked.

"_Jake is one of us?" _Maya sounded upset, appalled even.

"_Sarah is just 13." _Lauren said sounding completely concerned.

"_Oh great, more voices." _Claire's thoughts were annoyed.

Sam strode right up to them and silenced us with her one question.

"_Jacob…Sarah…what happened."_

Sarah took a scared step forward to explain what happened minutes before we arrived.

"_Well…Jake was trying to sneak out to go see Jordan and try and talk to her one last time. I knew he was going to try soon, I could tell. I could see it in his mood and in his eyes. He's been missing her like crazy, going crazy without talking to her. He's been hurting because she acts like he doesn't exist. I tried to stop him and we started arguing because he didn't know how much he's been hurting mom lately by being so depressed and angry at everyone, and he just didn't care. We started really yelling at each other and…well…"_

The rest of the story spoke for itself.

"_I never would've thought…I never even paid attention to…"_

We could tell Sam's thoughts were more directed to herself. All of us were shocked.

Jake just stood there staring at me with disbelieving eyes, and I did the same. I didn't even blink, my eyes were just clouded with my emotions.

We barely paid any attention to what was being said, we never took our eyes off each other.

He finally spoke.

"_Jor…say something…"_

I still stared blankly at him. It was nothing I _could_ say. Oh, but how I wish I _could_ say. How I wished I could speak.

"_**Why won't you say something to me?!?!?" **_He was getting so angry.

"_What's wrong Jordan?" _Sarah's voice was heartbroken and afraid.

"_I can't speak to him. I'm not supposed to be around him unless it's absolutely necessary." _My voice was barely above a whisper, and you could still hear the tears in it. Even as we spoke, the pain from disobeying the Alpha's order was pummeling against me. Being in his presence was squeezing my head to death, smashing my brain against my skull. My muscles ached in rebellion, all too willing to take off in the blink of an eye and never look back. Ready to run far away from the cause of the pain and the suffering.

I never wanted this. I never wanted this for him. For either of them. This was wrong. They didn't deserve this. They shouldn't have to suffer like me. _HE_ shouldn't have to suffer the way I do. I would gladly take all his pain and suffering without complaint. If only I had been able to leave. If only I had been able to run. If only I didn't have this stupid Alpha command, I would've been able to tell him how much I love him and how sorry I was in the first place.

"_Wait, you love me? Alpha command? What is she talking about?" _He heard my thoughts, and now he was talking really fast. I knew he was only getting more upset.

Sam sighed. She should have known this day would come. The day when she would have to face the music of her own. Maybe not the way she expected, but it still came. I silently sat back and watched things unfold with a hint of satisfaction in my heart.

Sam's voice was tired and regretful.

"_Jacob…an alpha command is when the alpha of a pack gives a command and you have to do it. You have no choice."_

"_Pack? What pack?"_

"_We're the pack, Jacob. And you're a part of us now. You're one of us. We protect La Push. The alpha of the pack is the leader. And I'm the Alpha."_

"_What command did you put her under?" _He was getting even more furious, I could hear it in his voice. I could see it in his eyes.

"_I…I forbade her from seeing you or speaking to you. She wasn't allowed to be around you. She wasn't able to speak to you when she got back except for one sentence. 'We can never speak again.'" _I saw Jacob cringe from hearing those words again, I cringed even harder than he did. That was it.

Jacob's ears flattened to his skull and he bared his teeth at Sam as he growled ferociously at her.

"_**YOU DID WHAT?!?!?"**_

"_I only did what I thought was best for the both of you. I did it to protect you, Jacob Clearwater. Jordan wasn't stable, she was a danger around you. She couldn't control herself. She could've harmed you."_

"_**JORDAN WOULD NEVER HURT ME!"**_

Jacob launched himself at Sam, biting straight at her throat. They began to rumble around fighting, while we were trying to break them up.

My tears completely clouded my vision now, all I saw was blurs.

Sam finally pinned Jacob down after great effort, though he was still fighting to get up and attack her.

"_**JACOB CLEARWATER, STOP FIGHTING."**_

Jacob started to whimper, cringe, and cry out as the edict of the Alpha command came down on him. It was so heartbreaking, so painful to watch. To watch the person you love with your entire being be tortured is a suffering indescribable. I never wanted to see Jacob in that much pain. I never wanted to see him in any pain. Especially after all the pain I've already caused him. Why was she doing this? This was so wrong. I never wanted this for him. This was just _cruel_.

"_STOP!" _I was finally able to speak, so I bellowed out my plead to Sam through my own cries.

All eyes were on me, my eyes were on him, and Sam's eyes were going back and forth between us.

"Jordan, you may speak and see Jacob Clearwater again." The timber in her voice felt freeing, like cuffs and shackles finally being removed off of every bone in my body.

I ran over to his side to help him.

He looked up at me, exhausted.

"_Jordan…" _He said softly.

For the first time in a long time, I smiled.

"_Jacob."_

TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK!!!


	19. Chapter 18

**Chapter Eighteen: Eternity**

Sam showed Jacob and Sarah how to phase back and an hour later after they get the hang of it and we got them some clothes, we had a pack meeting at Kim's house. All of the counsel members were present. The tension in the air was thicker than thick when Jacob and Sarah realized their mother was there, assuming the position of their father. No words could paint the portrait of pain on their sad and hurt faces.

As much as Jake and I wanted to talk, _needed_ to talk, we had to listen to Sam first.

"Sue, how could you not see the signs?"

"I never expected, I mean…I was so busy. I thought we all were just going through a rough time. I never paid attention. I never even considered the possibility…"

"It's alright Sue. No one expected it. I'm sure not even Harry did." I saw Sue Clearwater wince at the sound of her late husband's name.

"But what about Jacob?" Lauren asked.

"What about me?"

It was the first time Jacob had spoke since he rose off the forest floor, he had been silent the entire time. Even when he first saw his mother was in attendance, he still said no words.

"Jacob, you're the only male werewolf." Lauren spoke with a hint sarcasm in her voice.

"So? What's wrong with that?"

Sam gave Jacob a serious stare, and all the humor in the situation was gone. "Jacob, there hasn't been a male werewolf since the Great Spirit Warrior Taha Aki."

Jacob's face fell, he now understood. He understood what it meant, and what that meant for him. What it meant he was.

"So…I'm a…freak."

"No, we're all freaks, you're just more of a freak than the rest of us." Maya laughed at her own cruel joke, but stopped when Sam gave her a threatening look.

"So…so what does this mean?" Jacob revealed the fear in his voice, the feelings of isolation. I'm sure it was a mistake he never meant to happen, but if anyone would pick up on it, it would be me.

"We don't exactly know yet." I could tell from Sam's eyes she was trying to be the calm one in the situation, and she was being very thoughtful and choosing her words carefully to explain the lack of knowledge she had about what was going on. She spoke with such authority, though, you had no choice but to believe her.

Jacob sat there silently trying to cope, he looked like he felt so alone in this world. Everybody left Jacob alone with his thoughts so he could absorb the abnormality of this situation, and I stayed seated next to him. For I could not move either. This news was shocking to me also, yes, but I couldn't be more frozen. I felt completely frozen in time, completely frozen in space, unable to move or to think clearly. One singular thought replayed in my mind, and that was Sam's words: 'Jordan, you may speak and see Jacob Clearwater again'. Well that, and less developed thoughts like the words "Jacob" and "werewolf" and "together". Could it really be happening? I believe this thought was partly responsible for the state of shock I was currently immobilized in. If this wasn't real, if this was a dream, if none of this actually happened and was all really some elaborate dream or thought train I had in-subconsciously came up with, I would die. I would still die either way, but this would make me more apt to kill myself. The pain from realizing all of this was imaginary was more scrutinizing than imaginable, like having my heart ripped out all over again. There was no way this could be happening. I felt like if I moved, or even breathed the wrong way, thought the wrong thought…it would all be over.

I glanced at Jacob through my peripheral taking a chance, and he still hadn't moved. Not one single inch. I wouldn't even be sure he was breathing if I didn't hear a sigh every now and again. He just stared blankly into space, as animated as I was.

I realized that somewhere in my being I wanted to touch him, to console him, to do anything at all…but I was afraid. It would end in the blink of an eye, in the snap of a finger, at the intake of a breath he would be gone.

He scared because he placed his had on mine when I was lost away in my thoughts, then looked at me. I looked into his eyes, and he kissed me. And not just a regular kiss. This kiss was unprecedented. It was irrevocably the best out of all the other kisses we've shared in the past. A kiss so warm, so full of passion and unspoken emotions, thoughts, words, and feelings…and so tender.

I pushed him away and before I knew what I was doing, I had jumped clear across the room trying to get back from him.

"NO! No Jake."

This action shocked and alarmed him, it alarmed the both of us. I wasn't even sure what my reasoning for doing so was completely…

"What's wrong Jordan?" He felt as if he did something wrong. He had done _**nothing**_ wrong. It was me. All me.

"This is wrong. You should hate me. The way I've treated you all this time? The way I've broken your heart…" My tears were flowing heavily as I spoke these heartbreaking truths…but wasn't I right? Was I not correct and thinking I wasn't good enough to be with him, for feeling all the guilt and remorse from the inhumane things I had done to him?

"Jordan, it wasn't your fault--"

"Yes it was! All because I'm this monster! This animal! This stupid thing I can't control! This freak! All because I have to do whatever these stupid commands say, no matter what."

He gave me an intense stare as he stood up. He was cautious about approaching me, though, I could tell he was afraid I would run off again. He was right to be.

"Jordan…you know what I thinking about when they were talking?"

I shook my head no as I slid down the wall to hug my knees. I buried my face this way, I couldn't even stand looking at him. Though I could feel his eyes never left me. Nor did they get any less intense.

He walked over to me and knelt down beside me, carefully placing a warm hand on my shoulder. His touch was so calming, I felt slightly relieved instantaneously. He always had that ability with me.

"I thought…an eternity…as a werewolf…at least I'll still have Jordan." I flinched at this thought, and he saw it. He tried harder. "Jor, listen to me…no matter what mistakes we may make, no matter what you say or do…I'll still love you. We'll still be together. You'll have me. For eternity. You're seeing this as a bad thing, and that hurts me. Because I see it as something so positive, as a blessing. Yes, you've made mistakes. We both have. But the great news is…we have an eternity to learn from them. Together."

I looked up at him with the tears flowing down my face.

"Eternity?" My voice was shaken.

"Eternity." He said with an unmistakable clarity and sense of pride, with a love and wonder one could only imagine. He smiled, then kissed me again. I didn't think it was possible, but these sparks were even hotter than the last.


	20. Chapter 19

**Chapter Nineteen: Rare**

"No, not like that."

He huffed and puffed as he rolled his eyes, but I knew he was just being dramatic.

"Then how, Jordan?"

"Jake, it's not rocket science. Just simple strokes, up and down."

I smiled at him, and he still pretended to be annoyed. We were just painting my room, but I found it oddly amusing to intentionally get on his nerves.

"Fine Jake, you wanna act like a big baby? Then I'll treat you like a big baby. Aww come here snooky-wooky face." He ran from me as I chased him around the room making baby faces at him.

"Cut it out, Jor." He was laughing.

"Or what?" I put on my tough-girl face and placed my hands defiantly on my hips.

He was approaching me now. "Oh, you don't even want to know." He bit his bottom lip.

"I think you're all talk, Jacob Clearwater." I braced myself for what was to come next.

"Oh yeah?"

I took off at the flash of lightening out of the house with him hot on my tail. I ran into the woods and phased, he was only behind me by milliseconds.

The chase became an all out race, one that I was winning.

"_You'll never win Jake. I'm faster than you."_

Jake huffed which would be his equivalent of rolling his eyes. Before I could blink he shot off like a bullet ahead of me, running at full speed. I pushed harder, the hardest I've ever pushed, and was still barely touching the tip of his tail. Jake was **FAST**. Faster than me. And I was the fastest in the pack.

"_You _were _the fastest in the pack."_

He stopped abruptly and tackled me to the ground, both of us laughing as we rolled around playing. We had stopped in this meadow where the moonlight shone in beautifully. We phased back and pulled on some shorts, I pulled on a tee too, then fell onto the soft grass in the very center of the clearing away from the edge of the trees.

We laid there holding each other staring up into the nighttime sky, utterly content with the world. With our world. With each other.

"You know…I was beginning to believe I would never feel this happy again. That I would never have you again."

I smiled. "I never had any doubt in my mind. I always knew we would be together. Whether in this life, or the next."

He held me tighter, and we stared up at the stars through the clearing of treetops. The moon was so bright, and full. It was beautiful.

"Well now…now we have nothing to worry about. Now we could be together forever."

I looked down sadly, knowing it wasn't true. I had knew this for some time now, it had been plaguing my conscience. I realized it shortly after we found out we could be together. How could it be ignored, such an obvious truth? It was all around us. Though I hadn't spoken of it, it had been eating away at me like a parasite. I never wanted to face that reality.

And as much as I would've hoped, my change in mood did not go unnoticed.

"What's wrong, babe?"

"What? Nothing." I could never lie well. Or at least, not to him. He knew me so well…

"Come on Jor, tell me."

"Jacob, there _is_ something that can come between us. Something that can break us apart forever."

He got quiet and I knew he was thinking.

"I've been thinking about it, too. It's so scary. I don't want to lose you."

"But what if it happens? What if you do and I'm left all alone?" I started crying.

"What if _you_ do and _I'm_ left out in the cold? I mean, there's a way better chance of you than me. You're not the lone boy werewolf."

I wiped my tears away and giggled a little at his joke, as he ran his fingers through my hair.

"Imprinting is supposed to be this beautiful, wonderful thing. But all I see coming from it is pain and misery." I thought of how much I resented the process and thought of imprinting. I hated everything about it. It was a horrid, horrid force that controlled peoples' lives. Never once thinking twice about those it would destroy to happen.

"Imprinting is magical. It's something we don't fully understand, nor can we control. It's out of our power."

I snuggled in closer to his chest as I thought about this, and we were both silent for a few minutes.

"I've been trying to make myself imprint on you." My voice was barely above a whisper, but I knew he heard me.

"I have, too."

I squeezed him as hard as I could as my tears poured like steady rain.

"Why couldn't it be you, Jacob? You're the one I want! Why can we ever just be together?"

"Shh..shh…it's alright." He was trying to soothe me, but I could feel his wet tears in my hair. He was crying, too.

"We'll be fine, Jordan. And remember what the elders said. Imprinting is magic, but it's also extremely rare. Not every werewolf does it."

And that was my only comfort in this situation. The only glimmer of hope, my only ray of light. My only reassurance that we could be together. That we still had a chance.


	21. Chapter 20

**Chapter Twenty: Never Saw That Coming**

"This is so romantic. This was such a romantic movie."

Jacob looked at me weirdly. "Romantic? Jordan, it's Transformers."

I smiled. "I know, but the way Sam care's about her and try's so hard to impress her is so sweet."

He nibbled on my ear. "Well I know a little something about that." I giggled and bit my lip, I could feel my face turn ten shades of red.

Jake looked thoughtful for a second, then took my hand. "Come on, I want to show you something."

He led us upstairs and I looked at him crazily. It's not like I haven't seen up here before.

"Um, Jake…I've seen your room a million times."

"Just wait."

He grabbed his quilt off his bed, then reached up to this small door in his ceiling. He slid it back and pulled a case of stairs down, leading to the small attic. I'd never been up _there _before.

He carefully helped me up into the dark, dusty room…which was unnecessary. Werewolves almost never fall or trip. When we got up there, ducking mind you, he walked over to a the only window in the room which was on the other side of it. He opened it and was about to swing his leg out. Making me have a heart attack.

"JAKE!!!"

He stopped, looking panicked.

"What?!?"

"What are you doing, are you crazy?" The 2 story fall wouldn't break his neck, but it would definitely leave him with a crook the size of New York.

He smiled, then held out his hand.

"Don't worry. Do you trust me?" He gave me that same seductively persuasive smile, playing on my love of Disney cartoons. But I couldn't help it, his Aladdin reference was so romantic, and fit perfectly for the moment. After all, he had introduced me into a whole new world. I smiled and took his hand. "Of course I do."

When I stepped out, we were on a flat piece of the Clearwaters' roof. The view was great. The night sky was gorgeous, and we could see the whole block. Little houses made almost exactly like Jacob's forming a straight row, lighting up and lining the street both sides. Behind the row on the right side, the side his house sat on, the top of the forest swayed magically in the light summer breeze. It moved so magically it was hypnotizing, it made you really appreciate it. As a life force, as some moving, breathing, living thing.

"It's beautiful Jake."

He laid out the quilt and we laid on it, my head resting on his falling and rising warm chest.

"I come up here a lot. Especially when you were gone. Not just to clear my head, but…I also had a clear view of the forest. That's the exact spot you disappeared into the trees that night on your birthday, the very last time I saw you. The last time I saw that you existed, physically, though I could still feel you were out there. I could always feel something. And no matter how hard I tried to fight it or try not to, whenever I came up here to sit…my eyes were always drawn back to that very spot."

I bit my lip at that memory, at all the pain I had caused him then. Just thinking about it made my heart hurt and my stomach cringe, making me want to kick myself a million times in the brain. I fought back my accusative thoughts, and realized about this moment.

I had been going back and forth in my mind since he brought me up here, then I decided. Now was perfect. I sat up and smiled at him, making sure all of the emotions I was about to confess to him were heavily visible in my eyes. He needed to be able to see down to my heart, so I opened up enough to let him do that. He needed to know I was sure, and that I would not change my mind.

"Jake…"

"Jordan…"

"I love you."

He smiled again. "I love you, too." I could tell this was confusing him, but he would have to hold tight for a bit. This took a lot of confidence to say, just like it took a lot of confidence to decide.

I leaned down to kiss him, and I felt the waves of electricity between us travel down though my body. Like shocks, but extremely pleasant. They pulsed through me with an urgency like no other, making me want and crave him like nothing else in this world. The need to be with him, physically, became heavily prudent on my priorities list. Nothing else mattered. His touch, his scent, his taste, everything about him driving me insane but I didn't want him to stop. I didn't want to stop. The thought of me and Jacob made me weak and tremble every time, like there was this undeniable magic. A chemistry as strong as the forces of nature, unable to be broken or severed by anything.

He gently rolled me on my back, and kissed me more passionately. Obviously the passion and tension and force felt between us wasn't affecting just me. He kissed me with more emotion than he ever has, it was unprecedented. He ran his burning hand under my t-shirt on my stomach, making me shiver down to my toe tips. He ran it higher and higher, rubbing and caressing me with the same fervency I showed him. His want, need to touch me, hold me, feel me was made obvious by this.

He stopped before things got to heated, just seconds before. He looked at me when I grabbed his hand, then placed it back where it belonged. He looked at me, not understanding, or understanding but not sure if he was understanding correctly, or if I was understanding if that was what I wanted.

I smiled gently at him and gave him a softer kiss of reassurance, brushing my tongue against his bottom lip asking for entry. The gentleness I took with the kiss showed him exactly how I wanted him to take it, how much I loved him, and how much I wanted to do this. He granted my entry and tasted my mouth, leaning back down on top of me.

A fierce howl sounded through out La Push, loud and urgent enough to scare everybody. We stopped and looked into the direction it sounded, knowing it could be anything good.

He hopped off me and we hopped up, stripping off our clothes in seconds. In the blink of an eye we phased midway to the ground, jumping from the roof. We took off into the woods, getting the heads up about what was going on.

The situation was so serious, though, that Maya didn't even make fun of us for what we were doing or what we were about to do before we phased when she picked through our heads.

"_Claire picked up a scent, a new one, and she's chasing the leech."_

Claire sounded winded. _"Damn, he's fast."_

"_He? It's a he now? I thought it was a she?" _Jacob asked.

"_Must be a new one." _Sam said.

"_Wait! Or maybe not!" _I screamed.

"_What do you mean?" _Sam asked as she dashed and dodged the trees in her path with no effort. A second later, she was leading the chase of the bloodsucker with Claire on her right flank. I could tell from her thoughts that in a few seconds, Lauren would get there _to take her left flank._

"_Look at this." _I showed memories of the night Jacob and Sarah phased, giving them the description of the brief scent I caught before we were all distracted.

"_Yep, that's it. We're getting close. For some reason, I think he's slowing down." _Lauren added.

Jacob and I took off even faster, I was right on his shoulder.

I saw they had cornered the leech against a tree in their thoughts, and a few seconds later Jacob & I arrived. Maya was behind us, with Kim & Sarah seconds after her.

We all made a v-formation, with Sam at the point. Maya & Lauren took Sam's flanks, with Claire off Lauren's shoulder and Kim off Maya's. I was off Kim's, and Jacob was off Claire's. Sarah stood back a little, slightly behind the protection of Jacob.

I looked at the vampire, his appearance was downright creepy. Mostly because he looked so average, so normal. The fact that he looked perfectly human, apart from a few things, was completely unsettling. It wasn't comforting, it was scary. He was pale, and about 6 feet. His hair was light brown, cropped shortly, and his eyes. His eyes were black, blacker than the night, and empty. They looked hungry, and angered. And amused. He had a crooked smile on his face, he didn't appear to be scared. He smelled horribly, like baby powder and ammonia. His clothes were ratty and worn, completely dirty. He didn't wear shoes, and his hair was ridden with leaves and twigs.

Sam growled fiercely at him as she took one step toward him, and we all followed suit. He gave another wicked smile then jumped up into the tree. He jumped from the tree and took off running north at the speed of light, how fast he moved slightly amazed me.

Jacob took off first taking the lead, and we were all chasing him. Faster and faster he ran, as if he were heading for something.

Right when Jacob was about to have him and catch him between his teeth, he took a step that Jacob couldn't. Jacob got pushed back as if it were a force field, something pushing him away from him. Him, the leech, ran straight into the arms of a redheaded bloodsucker with an evil smile like a Cheshire cat and burning red hair that ran down to her back. It was wild and vibrant, ridden with twigs and leaves just like his. The way she held on to him for dear life noted me that she had been waiting for him, or at least looking for him too.

They held each other, standing in this one spot, with a wicked smile on their faces. The amusement was visible in their dark eyes.

For when Jacob slammed into this invisible force field, the rest of us did too. We hadn't even been paying attention to Sam's thoughts. Sam, who approached the very spot slowly, never taking her eyes off of the sight before her.

The sight before us, past the male leech and his mate, past this invisible spot that none of us could cross, was 9 well dressed vampires completely frozen in that eerey way they can stand still. They never took their eyes off us, as we did them, and their facial expressions were unreadable. But it didn't take a mind reader to read what they were thinking, that's why none of us let our guard down. But we were all confused at the moment.

The couple, the vampires we had chased, laughed to themselves as they found themselves in the very middle of both groups.

The other vampires, were just as unnerving as the ones we chased. More because they were more mysterious, than they were frightening. One of them, I'm guessing was the leader, had blonde hair and looked like a model like the rest of them. He looked about 23 years old, but the way they regarded his presence and respected him alerted me he was much older than he appeared. The one who seemed most worried about him taking the point was a woman with long flowing brunette hair, and a warm heart shaped face. She looked more worried than any of them. The biggest one, more of a body guard, stood very closely to the beautiful blonde one. There was another blonde boy, his hair was messier and he looked younger, who was hovering protecting around a little female with black spiky hair. She had a very pixie-like look about her, not being taller than five feet. But when you looked at _him_, especially when he made eye contact, you had a sense of calm fall over you. It was eerie, and uncomforting. Though it did make you feel relaxed, just against your will. The skinny tall male with bronze hair stood close to the younger looking brunette boy, who was standing close to the older man with the mustache. Wait, they looked familiar. The older man with the mustache and the younger boy looked very familiar.

The rest of the pack ignored my thoughts as they assessed the entire situation, including these new developments.

Sam finally spoke.

"_The Cullens." _

The Cullens? That weird vampire family that lived up in Forks? The ones that we don't attack, only because they feed on animals instead of people? I counted them. There were more than we were told. More than obviously we were aware of. These were the infamous Cullens. I looked in all of their faces, they all had the same golden eyes. Golden eyes, unlike the leeches we were chasing. These were the leeches who were the cause of the treaty, the entire reason we had a boundary line on our lands and theirs so they could hunt freely as we protect?

Wait, boundary line. Is that it?

I glanced at the two leeches we were chasing, they were still basking in the tension of the entire complicated situation.

"_I gave the alpha command long ago we were not to cross our borders. That's why Jacob couldn't pass." _Sam answered my question.

And these two bloodsucking parasites stood right on the border, just enough to where either side couldn't get to them.

"_We need permission to pass onto your lands." _Sam confused us, she couldn't have been talking to us.

"They need our permission to pass," The tall skinny bronze-haired one spoke in a monotone voice like a recorder, repeating Sam's sentence like a robot.

Could he? Could he read her mind?!? Could he read my mind??! Could he read _ALL_ our minds?!?!

The two leeches we'd chased took this golden opportunity of shock, confusion, and distraction to make their escape, running in a straight line all the way to god knows where. Never once taking a step into either territories.

The bigger leech that looked like a professional football player made a move to pursue then just as Jacob and Maya did but the blonde male with the messy hair stopped him, as I did them. I went back to looking at this young boy and man with the mustache, why do I have a feeling about them?

"We needed permission, too. For the past few weeks we'd been tracking the nomads through our lands, the both of them have been causing quite a disturbance. She ran right onto the boundary line."

"_So did the one we were chasing. They knew exactly what to do. So they had to have known." _Sam thought.

"So was the one they chased, he knew exactly what to do. They both had to know, had to plan it." The bronze-haired leech droned on.

"_Why would they bring us here, to an altercation almost? Did they know of the treaty?"_

"They nearly had us break the treaty. Did they know of it?" He sounded more like a robot with each statement, his face was blank and emotionless.

"They have a slight history with our newest members, and they came to exact revenge. They followed them here from Phoenix, and must've been plotting all this time. After observing how we both acted towards the territories, they must've concluded what the treaty entails. Everything they were suspecting was confirmed here tonight."

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. This was all happening because of something that happen to between them and those other leeches? And now people from La Push were dying? It was unfair! We should just rip their heads off now! Wait a minute…Phoenix.

Phoenix!

I looked harder at the two leeches who had been boggling my mind this entire time, and I knew it was true. I growled insanely as I crouched and my ears folded to my skull, ready to launch forward at them. Hearing it in my thoughts the mind reading parasite snapped out his thoughts and crouched in front of them to protected them, his reaction setting off the same reaction in the others.

"_JORDAN! WHAT IS IT?!" _Sam ordered, obviously upset at my sudden reaction.

"_JOR, WHAT'S WRONG?" _Jacob said, worried and ready to fight.

"_WHAT HAPPENED, JOR!?" _Sarah was scared.

I flashed the memory through my mind as I bared my teeth at the new "Cullens"._**"CHARLIE. BRIAN."**_

They all understood immediately. Jacob spoke first.

"_They're leeches?!?! How did that happened?!?"_

"_**JORDAN, CALM DOWN." **_The alpha command rang through me, making me cool over instantly. For now.

She spoke in that same calm and collected voice as she always did.

"_Your numbers have grown. That was not stated in the treaty. Nor did you let us know. "_

"_Now we know why Jacob and Sarah phased." _Lauren said in a low voice.

"_Why?" _Jacob said confused.

"_Jacob, the Quileutes only phase into werewolves when there are vampires around we need protecting from. And the Cullens live right in Forks. If their numbers grew, so did ours." _Kim said.

Jacob got angrier as he put the pieces together as to why he was like this. Why he was made into this beast. He growled as I had seconds before, ready to attack them.

The burly one spoke as he crouched. _"What's going on?"_

"They're upset because of Charlie and Brian. They said our coven getting larger was not a part of the treaty." The bronze-haired one announced.

"_TRAITORS!!" _I thought as I pictured ripping Charlie and Brian's heads off and burning their pieces.

"Jordan, it's not like that. It's not their fault. They haven't lied to you." The bronze-haired one said to me in a soothing, patronizing way. It freaked me out and angered me, he was answering my thoughts.

"_STAY OUTTA MY HEAD, YOU STUPID PARASITE!"_

"_**LEAVE HER ALONE." **_Jacob stepped in front of me protectively now, ready to attack the mind reader.

"Edward, let me do the talking." The blond leader said.

"Charlie and Brian were living in Phoenix, one night Brian was attacked by another vampire. One not like us, the one you were chasing tonight. James. James had every intention of turning Brian to join his coven, and after biting him he left him in the alley behind their house to change. He expected to return in 3 days to find Brian a new born. But I found Brian that night, and I thought he was dying. We were vacationing with Phoenix, and as I walked passed I smelled the blood and thought someone was in trouble. As I did with my other children, I expected to change him and teach him my way of life. To grant him a chance to live. But he was already going through the change. Brian stayed with me, but we had a confrontation with James. Edward read James mind and we found out he's a tracker, and will stop at nothing till he's gotten his prey. Like a game. And our reaction set him off. We fought him and his mate in Phoenix, after he'd taken Charlie hostage and bit him, but they escaped. They followed us here, seeking revenge on us for taking them."

I looked at them with shock in my eyes, and Brian nodded at me. I shook my head. That was not Brian. That was not the same boy I grew up with. That was not my best friend.

"_Those two are responsible for the killings in La Push, I propose we work together to catch them."_

"She says they think that James and Victoria are responsible for those people who have died in La Push, she thinks we should work together."

"No way!" The burly one shouted.

"Emmett!" The blond one said softly. Even when being yelled at, he still didn't raise his voice.

"No! That's not happening Carlisle! I'm not working with some--" His voice trailed off as his mood calmed, a tranquil smirk appeared on his face.

"Thank you Jasper." The messy blond boy nodded.

Could he control emotions? Since when do leeches have powers? Do ALL leeches have powers?

"At noon tomorrow I will come to La Push to speak to counsel to work out arrangements." Carlisle, the leader, said.

Sam nodded once, then started to walk away. The rest of the pack followed her. I stayed behind staring at Brian. He stared back at me, till Edward started pulling on his arm telling him it was time to go.

Jacob butted my shoulder lightly, and I walked away.

Wow, never saw **_that _**coming.


	22. Chapter 21

Chapter Thirteen: Truce

I glanced up at the clouds that hid the sun away today. It was a calm day, but if felt almost too calm. Almost like the calm before a really bad storm. I could smell the rain on the air, I knew it would be here in a few hours. Three, give or take. We arrived at the line five minutes before we saw the pitch black Mercedes come to a speeding halt on the shoulder of the highway. The blonde man got out of the driver's seat, but he was not alone. The blonde boy from last night stepped out of the passenger seat, with the tiny spiky-haired female and the blonde female got out of the back. Sam crossed her arms across her chest and the five of us did the same. They were outnumbered, no doubt they'd noticed. Sam had decided she wasn't completely sure if the vampires were on the up and up, so she brought a fair number of us with her to the border. Deciding which ones was the hard job. She knew she wanted me, so she could keep a close eye on me at all times. She wanted Sarah to stay and guard the elders and the council, since she was the youngest of the pack. Though she also knew Sarah wasn't that strong of a fighter, so she asked Jacob to stay with Sarah. Jacob was immediately torn then, he didn't want to leave Sarah by herself. But there was no way he would leave my side, after hours of stubborn arguing he'd made his point very clear to Sam. So he was with us at the border to welcome the arriving leeches. He settled for having Maya there to guard Sarah and the elders and the council, leaving Lauren, Claire, and Kim to have Sam's back.

The vampires approach the line cautiously, with the blonde leader as their point again. And the blonde boy was on his right flank.

"Sam, we're here on a non-hostile basis. We've come only to talk."

Sam nodded. "No harm will come to you while you're on our lands."

She nodded again slightly, it was almost unnoticeable, and then Kim and Claire took off in opposite directions. One ran east, running the course of the line, and the other ran west. Sam was not foolish, she was making sure the vampires were trying anything. We led the procession in to La Push, stopping when we reached my house. Sarah stood waiting outside the door, just as Kim and Claire came walking out of the woods. I caught a faint glimmer of uncertainty cross the blonde female's face, but as quickly as it came it went. I wasn't even sure I hadn't imagined it, I realized the vampires wore poker faces very well.

We entered the house and I saw the poker faces of my father, Sue Clearwater, and old Quil Ateara. Sam nodded at the council, and Carlisle gave a compassionate smile.

"Good afternoon, everyone."

"Hello, Dr. Carlisle." Billy gave a small smile, he was trying to be polite.

Suddenly, as the meeting began, I wondered if it was okay that we were here. I wondered, since we'd never been able to attend the other council meetings, were we allowed to attend this one. Sam answered my thoughts.

"Jordan, Jacob, and Claire will stay with me. The rest of you wait outside."

I caught Jacob wince for a half of a second as he watched Sarah walk outside, then he fixed his face to be blank again. I saw he wanted to her close to him in his eyes, the same way he wanted to keep me close. Yet again he was torn. I was sure these thoughts hadn't even crossed Sam's mind, though they had been blatantly obvious to me. I saw Sue's poker face flicker, too. So I wasn't the only one who'd noticed. Jacob wasn't the only one uneasy.

"I'm Billy Black, this is Sue Clearwater, and he's Quil Ateara Sr."

"These are my daughters, Rosalie Hale and Alice Cullen. This is my son, Jasper Hale."

The blonde boy nodded, and I grasped just how the entire situation felt. For what should have been a time where everything felt so tense you could have sliced through it with a butter knife, was calm and tranquil. It was clear why the doctor brought the boy.

"Sam and I spoke of this last night, I believe a truce would be the perfect solution to our current predicament. But first, I must apologize. Our numbers indeed have grown, and I know that it was one of the conditions of treaty, but I assure you we'd never broke it. We were not the ones who changed our new members, the vampire we're chasing did. They just accepted our live style as our own, unwilling to live like the others of our kind. They find our diet more applicable, and we've grown very much attached to them."

His voice was so calm and persuasive that the thought of showing hostility towards him now brought an instant guilt upon you. Because you would know he did not rightly deserve it. Dr. Cullen seemed to be so good natured. He was a kind man, and from what I'd heard he was the best doctor Forks hospital had ever seen. It went against the grain, the thought of a bloodsucker working in a hospital, but we'd never heard of anything bad happening there. But that doesn't mean that nothing bad has happened. It was why we'd advised the people of La Push to seek help at our own hospital here on the reservation. They didn't need to know why the Forks hospital was dangerous.

"What course of action do you feel we need to take to catch the vampire causing all of this havoc?"

Sue's voice was clear and unemotional, she kept her composure well.

"I believe that collaborative efforts are the best option for us. If we're working together we'll be able to stop James and his mate, and the place we call home will be safe once again. We can dissolve the truce and go back to the original treaty, if you'd like. After James and Victoria have been caught."

Sue and Old Quil looked over at Billy, and then he spoke.

"We've decided to cross that bridge when we reach it. For now, we'll work together to end this madness."

Carlisle smiled, and I noticed exactly how shiny each one of his straight, perfect teeth was. He was exceptionally flawless.

"Great. Now my daughter Alice has been helping us track James and Victoria. She has the gift to see the future."

The small spiky-haired one took a tiny step forward. Her eyes were flickering as she focused her sight on one thing, but her blank expression exposed she was not really seeing here. After a minute she blinked roughly one time, then looked at Billy thoughtfully.

"I've been watching James and Victoria's futures. It's sketchy because they're so indecisive. All of their decisions are pending on one thing, and they won't move until that's decided. All I can see is them carrying one thing, something red. Like maybe an article of clothing. It's really blurry. That's all I have. It looks like they're somewhere around Austin, or maybe Dallas."

Her voice was a peel of high-pitched wind chimes, it sounded so melodic and musical. It was so appealing.

"How come you cannot see when they are going to return to Forks?" Old Quil criticized.

Alice scrunched her face into a light glare. "My visions are subjective. The future changes only when someone changes their mind. Nothing is set in stone. The more set a person is on their decisions, the clearer they become in my visions."

"Thank you for your help, Alice." Sue added lightly.

Alice's expression lit up, making her show all of her sparkly white teeth in her smile. "You're welcome, Sue Clearwater."

"We figured coming up with a strategy would be our best chance to catch them."

Carlisle nodded once Jasper, and then he spoke.

"We can assume that since Brian is the object of their conquests, they'll be targeting places where his scent is the strongest. Which would be our home and Chief Swan's home up in Forks. If your pack could keep a tight perimeter around Chief Swan's house, my family and I will keep the perimeter around our home. We've learned that James is a tracker and will stop at nothing to get what he wants when my brother Edward read his mind. Since James already resorted to taking Chief Swan, we can assume that Brian's mother Renee will be next. But we haven't been able to locate her. She's a liability in this as well. My brother Emmett and I will be with every hunting party from our family from here on out when we have to feed, and we'll both be accompanying Brian when he needs to do so. Brian's protection is our main priority."

"No, innocent people are our main priority." Sam said coolly.

Jasper gave a small smirk. "All the same,"

Rosalie uncrossed her arms, and stepped forward. "Since we're joining forces, we should expand at least to Port Angeles and Seattle."

Sam nodded in agreement. "That seems logical."

"Thank you all for meeting with us and helping us with this. It won't be forgotten. Hopefully we can remain allies in the future. And maybe one day, even friends."

For some reason, Carlisle made me hope he was right. He shook the council's hands and then we began to escort them back to his Mercedes at the line. He looked at me thoughtfully and I glanced at him.

"Jordan, isn't it?" I nodded.

"I'm not sure how much of this you want to hear, but I promised him I would talk to you."

I sighed, already knowing who he was referring to.

"Brian misses you terribly, Jordan. He's truly sorry for all of his deceptions, but you must believe that what he is now is none of his fault. It was completely out of his control, and he is already forced to sacrifice too much of what his life used to be. Don't make him have to sacrifice the only friend he can keep, too. Brian is irrefutably unique because of what he can do Jordan, and because of that he is alone now more than ever. Can you imagine the guilt and blame he's making himself shoulder for causing such complications like this? The treaty allows you two to see each other again."

He placed his hand on my shoulder, and the feel of this shocked my system. It was so cold and hard, but I didn't shrug it away. That would've been rude. Carlisle looked at me with a serious face, I could see years of wisdom and age in his beautifully youthful honey-gold eyes.

"Don't waste this opportunity because of petty differences. In the end, it'll be a choice you regret."

He walked across the line and got into his car, I watched it speed away with what he said heavy on my thoughts. We walked back to my house, and I was silent. Kim, Claire, and Lauren were excited about when we would actually catch the leeches.

"Maybe we'll catch the female bloodsucker alone! And she'll have to fight her way out of it!" Lauren said.

"I hope we're the ones who catch them and not the Cullens!" Kim sounded as exhilarated as ever.

"No doubt the male will be trying to protect the female! That's two for one!" Claire added.

I thought no one noticed my absence from the conversation or the distant expression on my face, but Jacob did. I'd made up my mind by the time we'd reached my house. I realized now that it wasn't Brian or Charlie's fault for what they'd become. Billy had accepted that, and now I had too. Carlisle had made up my mind. I had to speak to Brian. All of the others' filed into the house, but Jacob grabbed my arm holding my back so we could have some privacy.

"What's wrong Jor?"

I answered him casually. "Nothing. I'm going to the Cullen's house."

Suddenly his grip became tight.

"No, you're not. Jordan you can't. that's just stupid. The Cullens can't be trusted.

"Jacob, I have to. He was my best friend. I owe him that much."

"You don't owe him anything! He's not the same person you knew, Jordan. He's changed!"

"Just like we've changed?" I challenged. He fell silent and his lips pursed in a tight line. He narrowed his gaze on me.

"You're not going Jordan. I won't let you."

His arms were shaking as he spoke through his gritted his teeth. I gripped the hand he had wrapped on my arm like a shackle.

"Jacob, I'm going whether you like it or not. I have a father, and you cannot tell me what to do. If you want to stop me, you'll have to fight me."

The thought of a russet brown wolf and a grey wolf with black spots, Jacob and I, tumbling on the forest floor fighting was not an inviting image. It was painful to even picture. And I didn't want this to have to come to that. And he didn't either. I saw defeat swimming in his eyes as his stone face waivered, he slowly released my arm and watched me stalk away.


End file.
